Crazed Bird Destroying House - Can Anyone Help?

Just a thought - is there something you could apply to the screen itself that would make it less appealing to the little feller?

I'm sorry scutler but I had to laugh at this:

maybe something (maybe not totally organic but that has little impact on the enviroment) like hair spray? Remember that avon "skin so soft" has been used at race tracks to repel flies and people have used it to repel mosquites (sp?)

Dyson, thanks for the idea. If the bird's obsession were limited to the screens, that might work; unfortunately, the crazy bird has already shown that, when chased from the screens, he IS willing to destroy other things. When the scarey faces temporarily kept him away from the 1st story windows (with screens), he just moved his operation to the 2nd story windows which don't even have screens. When he goes up to the 2nd story windows, he holds onto the sash and pecks on the windows and sash es(ALL day). The screens are already "totalled". I fear that his constant pecking on the 2nd story window trim will damage/pit that as well.

On the light sider, in addition to the automatic water gun perched on flower pots and aimed at the windows (must get pic of this), the 7 or so scarey faces posted in the windows, the CD's and mylar strips in the tree, I'm now picturing my house with skin so soft smeared all over the 2nd story windows and caked on the 1st story screens...and one very determined, little bird pecking away somewhere else, perhaps the siding this time. : )

Lilypon, I know that you are laughing WITH me, and I find that it helps me to keep my perspective. Afterall, I'm sure that "this too shall pass"...in about 7 years when the bird dies...and, this will just be one hilarious memory - is it 2012 yet?

This bird has become my whale (Melville allusion). We have entered a love/hate relationship. Because he threatens to take my home apart one beak-ful at a time, I'm wishing bad things for his future. On the other hand, I have been offered the unique opportunity to spend time (way too much of it, I hasten to add) at close proximity to him such that I have gotten to "know" him in a way that I have not known any other bird. I get to see his little face up close as he rips at my screens and pecks on the windows. I "see" glimpses of his personality. At times I even admire his persistence, all the while despising his complete unwillingness to yield to my authority. Yep, he's my whale.

Oh, and I can't tell you how much time I spent this weekend adjusting the water spray up and down, trying to repair all of the leaks in the hose connectors, rigging up various other unsuccessful deterents, chasing him around the yard, etc, and all while slogging around in my backyard swamp! In my life I have "mastered" high-strung and problematic horses. Never before has such a small creature made me feel so helpless.

I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!

Got a video camera?????

Often the journey, rather than the destination.

I have not seen Mr Titmouse lately. I did find a spare feather. Saturday will be the real test of whether he is still around or not - and he never lets me down.

I would like to add that, for any who don't know, apparently it is against both federal and (in most cases) state laws to harm a non-game, wild bird for any reason, even if he is destroying your house. The feds have, however, posted "helpful" suggestions. It seems the home owner is responsible for determining what the bird wants and how to rectify the problem. I laughed more than a few times when I read the federal guidelines and suggestions. Clearly, the writer has never dealt with an obsessive-compulsive titmouse bent on destroying an edifice.

ROTFLMBO!!!!! I just stumbled into this thread and haven't laughed so hard since the "find the dog" thread a couple of months back! I wish you good luck in ridding yourself of your little "whale", and also to the little titmouse, may he find peace and happiness elsewhere in his life.
Pati

I have tears coming out of my eyes. My husband has just come downstairs in his underwear to see what is going on. I am laughing and pointing at the computer monitor and he is not amused and has gone back to bed madder than a wet hornet. I have to tell you I am totally amused and am still laughing when I scroll back up and look at the photo of the titmouse where you typed, "He is sitting on a branch about 10" from the window glaring at me because I just interrupted his project". Actually, I am reading all of your comments over again a few times and I am ready to collapse from laughing and gasping for air.

I have no words for your comments other than that I had to go get a pillow to lean into because I am laughing so hard I hurt. I guess this is what is referred to as a "Depends" moment too.

Not that this will make you feel any better but a few years ago I made the mistake of opening up our bedroom window early one morning and feeding a pair of Canada Geese by tossing nice greens out on to a slightly lower roof. Need I say any more.

We had all the trim replaced a few times. The male literally tore the screens to shreds assisted by his lovely bride. We removed those to have them re-screened a few times and finally took them off completely because he destroyed the frames. The very next morning he banged on the glass so hard he actually broke it so we had to replace the pane of glass. It literally got to the point that I had to set a plate of offerings on the chair next to that window BEFORE we went to bed to be able to appease the "Geese Gods" at the crack of dawn so I could go back to sleep. Every morning at sunrise they were out there demanding to be fed. Have you any idea how loud geese are? To add insult to injury. They liked hanging out on our roof so much that they would go up to higher roofs to hang out during the day. We have a black roof. Goose poop is white. The roof literally started looking as if snow had fallen on it.

We finally boarded up the double windows on that side of the bedroom and we could still hear them honking and banging on the plywood. We didn't know what else to do. And then it struck me. The nice neighbors who leave their dogs out to bark all night long during warm months for the last four years in a row. Yes, that was the ticket. I began tossing balled up compacted greens up on their roof using a sling shot. Took me a while to master the technique but I was successful.

I have no idea what to even suggest to you and am sort of hoping that since you haven't posted since Oct 20th that the spare feather you found will be all that is left of your nightmare in Charleston. I have never heard of anything like this before in my life.

These stories are absolutely hilarious - in retrospect, I'm sure. That will teach you to mess with mother nature, Lauren! LOL
Hope the titmouse gave up and went somewhere else!

I'm IGNORING him! I've been very busy the last few weeks. He starts his project at the crack of dawn and, except for a very few brief "coffee breaks", works non-stop until just before dusk. I pray for darkness! The 4 downstairs screens are already hopelessly damaged. I've found that if I leave him alone he ONLY contributes to the damage on those windows, whereas if I try to deter him, he damages other parts of the house. His project site is on the downstairs back of the house, but I can hear him quite well from my office on the upstairs front of the house. Unlike the geese, the sound is not so loud as to be annoying in its on right; it's just that I recognize it as the sound of the very slow decomposition of my house!

By now it is clear that he knows I don't want him to destroy the house. He seems to enjoy the challenge of circumventing my attempts to stop him. My gardener, who does most of his work while I'm at away, called to warn me that a small bird is damaging my windows!

I have concluded that Mr Titmouse needs a rubber birdcage. I think that he may have fallen from the nest as a flegling and hit his head!

Equlibrium, I laughed all the way through your story from start to stop - and I needed that! I'm thinking your story is particularly funny when read by someone who has experienced a renegade bird bent on destroying the house. That is an unbelievable story! From the snow covered roof to the broken glass, the boarded up window, and the retaliation against the bad neighbor. My but you are creative - and a bit scarey, I might add. : )

Patti, Pixydish, Equlibrium, and all, I am always balanced between total frustration and the ability to see that this is one rediculously funny situtation; so I enjoy reading your comments on how much you have laughed at and enjoyed my saga with Mr Titmouse, my personal whale.

BTW, when I lived in a very remote, rural area my run-ins with wildlife were few. Now I live in a subdivision within city limits. I chose a plot that adjoins the forest so that I would have more privacy in my backyard. When I moved in the neighbors told me "it's wild kingdom here." I laughed to myself, thinking "what do city folk know about wildlife?" That joke was on me.

Deer move along the side of my house as though it were a buffet line and even graze on potted plants on the front porch. In summer I can hear them walking behind the fence waiting impatiently for me to go inside.

The trees in the adjoining forest are littered with squirrel's nests. They spend the day trying to break in to the sqirrel proof feeders, eating seeds I plant, and digging up bulbs and small plants. I swear that they are sitting in the trees watching and memorizing my plantings.

Racoons and opossums make nightly raids in the backyard and do their best to destroy the bird feeders. One night I looked out the french doors on the back of the house and was startled to see 3 racoons standing upright on the patio looking in at me! They looked like strange children! One bright sunny Saturday morning I did a double take when I saw a medium sized dog eating birdfood in my fenced back yard - it was a racoon - at 10AM. I tried to chase him away but he wasn't afraid of me. I threw a can of soup beside him to "scare" him. He picked it up as if checking to see what I had given him.

When I pruned a small tree by the front door, the displaced birds broke a hole in and comandeered the front porch light fixture for a substitute roosting place. For the remainder of the winter I had to explain to visitors that I could not turn on the light because the birds were asleep. My Roomba vac managed to round up a tiny baby black snake in the master bedroom. A pack of wild boar came out of the forest one morning and "roto-tilled" my side yard in search of insects.

And believe it or not, a few years ago a peacock, yes a peacock, moved in to my backyard! He destroyed the birdfeeders and baths with his oversized "self",tore up the sod and beds looking for insects, knocked stuff over and broke shrubs and branches with his unweildy tail, and spent evenings roosting on my roof. His evening (2AM) mating calls were a dead-ringer for a tortured woman. He belonged to Middleton Garden. When called, they came to retrieve him. A few days later he returned - with his new girlfriend. For the next 2 years he adamantly refused to stay at his real home, having chosen my backyard garden instead.

Yes, this is Wild Kingdom ...But none of these even begins to compare to the tiny, little, titmouse!

This message was edited Nov 5, 2005 1:43 PM

Oh oh oh, I hurt, "Mr Titmouse needs a rubber birdcage". Please make the laughter pains go away.

I will add a comment. You should have seen the face on the guy who was sent out to my house from the board up service when he saw that the window was fixed. He got in his van to leave and I was like, ahem, wait just one moment here and get back up on that roof and board up those windows to my bedroom buddy. While he was up there boarding up the windows, the gruesome twosome honked out their disapproval from an upper roof and the guy told me he was afraid of geese. At that point I could have cared less what he was afraid of or not afraid of. Board it up!

I will spare you from my escapades with dealing with Mr. Heron who supplemented his diet with my imported Japanese Koi, The English House Sparrows attacking my carnivorous plants, the European Starlings systematically and methodically stripping this place of every seed, Bambi who uses this entire property as one big smorgsbord, and Thumper who strips the bark off my saplings as if it was butter, and, and, and get me that rubber room gosh darnit. I deserve it after living here for as long as I have.

That peacock would have been shot and I would have buried the evidence in a great big hole or dragged it out for the turkey vultures to pick at. And, you can take that to the bank. It's an introduced species just like the Mute Swan and these feral cats that run around here doing "thayre thang". I may put up with little displaced native fauna souls but I draw the line at introduced species that are altering the face of this planet and I will not let them add to the chaos over here. Now, where's that rubber room! I need a vacation.

Really incredible story here with Mr. Whacko Titmouse! We had a crazed Cardinal, looked like a juvenile, who was hell-bent on taking out another Cardinal bird he saw, only thing was it was his own image in the side mirror of a car parked at the park and ride at the bus stop. He went at it all summer long, it was like a scene that got cut out of Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds movie. It was weird, this bird would perch in front of the mirror and whack his beak against the mirror for lengthy periods of time before I guess he got dazed and flew off.

Joseph

Joseph, I think the cardinals must be particularly fond of car mirrors. A friend of mine had the same perplexing situation with his car and a cardinal. I've pretty much concluded that Mr Titmouse is not fighting with himself in the windows. He shows a "strong preference" for the screened windows. Given the quantity of dust on my screens, he can't possibly see a reflection in the windows. I think he's young, appears to be in molt. I think he has staked out my backyard, complete with feeder, birdbaths, and lots of seeding plants, as his new territory. He might be in trouble next spring when Ms Mockingbird has her brood and resumes her post as guardian of the backyard. She barely tolerates my presense.

Here is a good photo. At 1st it just looks like a pic of the windows displaying the scarey faces. If you look closely at the blue circle I added, you will see Mr Titmouse at his post and quite oblivious to the big orange owl faces!

A few more pics

Another

Notice how puffed up he looks in the pic below. He does that a lot when I chase him away from the window.

This tree is about 20' away from HIS window. It's where he goes when I chase him.

Laughing at the humans.

It's Mr. T of the bird world!

ignoring me

waiting for me to go. (Unable to wait any longer, he resumed work with me still standing there.)

pecking on the upper windows

Looking at me through the window

I'm trying to chase him away. He's trying to get back to work. This was taken throught he window. The camera lens is 1 window + about 6" from him.

Here's one to show you what I mean by the window setup, the tree, etc. As I said before, both "floors", both sets of windows are in a single room so I can't get to the top windows. The bottom ones have screens - Those are his favorites! He escapes to the crepe myrtle when I come out. If I chase him he flies over to the willow. When I block the lower windows, he goes up and pecks on the top ones.

through the window again. trying to chase him away. not working very well.

Today's screen damage shot. As you can see, he HAS been a busy little guy!

It sorta looks like the bird Princess Fiona blew up by singing her song to it in Shrek. Time to bring out the flame thrower?

Close up of worst area on a different screen. Remember there are 4.

Maybe that the answer. A flame thrower.Where do you get those?

You could always mix up a loose slurry of vegemite and spray it on the windows. That would repel most critters in life as we know it today.

One more - he's industrious. I keep thinking we could really use him at the office - I mean with his work ethic and attention to detail.

What is vegemite? Joseph, did you see the pic above showing the upstairs windows. When I chase him from the bottom he goes to the top. I'm trying to picture my house with this vege stuff smeared all over the top windows and dripping through the bottom screens. And will this start to smell over time? How will I get up to the top windows to apply it - or to take it down? I'm 5'2" tall. When I bought this house with 22' ceilings in some rooms and 12' ceiling in others, I did not take my shortcomings into account. I can't even change a light bulb around here.

Here is a picture of my backyard with the scarecrow in a flower pot perched on another flower pot. Isn't this lovely? When I set it up to spray the bottom windows, he goes to the top and vice versa.

on the screen.camera only inches away on the inside.

still through window.

yep, you got it. through the window still.