I know Cindy doesn't mind me telling, but she lost a child also. I have no idea how much hurt there is with the loss of a child and hope I never know. These ladies need our love and friendship now more than ever, and lets all help each other to remember that.
Wherever you are at noon today, lets all remember to lift up these families in prayer.
July: time for the red, white and blue!!
Been praying off and on all morning, but will definitely be praying at noon. Hopefully they will be able to feel the presence of our group sending them love and support!
I agree that Cindy said it very well. They are both constantly on my mine. God does have an ultimate plan but it's so hard when he takes young people just at the start of their life. Richard lost his oldest son when he was only 7 months old. It is still something that bears heavy on his heart. Sandra I didn't realize Cindy had also lost a child. I will be praying for them at noon.
I have spoken with Trisha by text this morning .......... she is struggling as would be expected and says she is having a particularly difficult time because she can't view the body because he was burned. I told her we were all praying and would continue to do so - praying God gives them both strength through these coming days and weeks.............
We cross posted Susan..................glad to see you hear on DG. I am sure Trish and Jeri appreciate all the prayers!!
Genna
I was so afraid that was going to be the case. Just can't imagine the emotions she is dealing with now. Glad you were able to text her Genna.
Spending my lunch time in a quiet place in prayer for both families............
I did too. Glad you were able to text Trish, Genna.
Cindy and Marilyn, and anyone else who has been through a similar loss, I know this probably opens old wounds; you were remembered in my prayers today. God bless and bring peace and comfort.
Thank you Elaine that was a very thoughtful thing to do. Yes I did have a son ,a special angel, born 45 years ago with multiple birth defects. We knew he would not be with us for a long time. Being only 18 we faced each day as they came. Jamie's time on earth was done after a short 2 years. I don't know how many lives he touched and how many miracles we had in those 2 years, but it was many. It never pains me to talk about him but his birthday is sometimes a little rough.
Ladies I can honestly say I felt you with me to day as we prayed. I have very fond memories of the day we all gathered together at Terrye' s for a circle of prayer and voiced our needs of prayer. I think that day made a very special bond for the ones that were there.
I just got the info from Jeri, but nothing else- here is the link to the obituary
http://obits.dignitymemorial.com/dignity-memorial/obituary.aspx?n=Cameron-Bordelon&lc=2672&pid=171642872&mid=6037721
I am really worried about Jeri, but she will talk when she is able. Maybe both of them felt our prayers today, I can't imagine the pain.
I was at our church today for our regular Monday morning prayer ministry. We meet every Monday and pray for an hour from 11a.m. to noon. I can tell you I felt a LOT of peace today as we prayed for different needs which had been requested by various people. Yes, we all feel like we want to do something more but believe me ladies, it is your prayers that will help Trish and Jeri and their families get through this difficult time.
Since Elaine asked for some guidance, I will send to you all who have commented here a Dmail with my suggestions as to how you can help Trish and Jeri and what to say and what NOT to say to them. I feel it would be better to say these things privately rather than on a public thread just because some of what I am going to say is still very personal to me.
Cindy, thanks for remembering that circle of prayer we had at Terrye's. It was a special time, indeed!
I think everyone has their own personal way of dealing with death and tragedy. Some people are willing and want to talk others do not. Nothing personal it's just their way of coping. I had a friend who lost her husband when she was in her mid forties and she did not want to talk to anyone! He had cancer and it had been a long drawn out ordeal. She told us she did not want to talk or to see anyone - that she just needed to be alone and work things out within her self. She is a religious person. After almost a year she finally started coming out and talking and eventually back to herself. It was just the way she had to cope with it. We obeyed her wishes during that year.
I know the death of a husband is totally different than that of a child but the same principal as far as personal needs. I have several friends that have lost children and grandchildren and they each handled it differently and had different needs from friends and relatives.
I am sure Jeri is having a very very difficult time. From what she has said she had just started being able to deal (not get over) with her daughters death. I remember her saying a Christmas or so ago that she had just started to feel joy again. Now the other daughter's son has been taken. Her plate has already been in overload. She has had more than her share of tragedy! It is going to take time and a lot of prayer for her. Sometimes I think the best thing that someone can do is just let the person know you are there for them and let them guide you as to what they need. They just need to know you care and are their for them. They certainly need our prayer.
I know I'm the kind of person that has to process things internally before I can talk about it.
I guess what I'm saying is we need to be mindful of different personalities.
Marilyn, that is a good idea. I will be watching for it.
Cindy, I didn't know that you had lost a child too until this came up. I am sure a child touches your life forever...... no matter the length of their life here on earth. Praying for you and Marilyn as well since I am certain that this does bring up a lot of familiar and painful emotions.
I did text Jeri this morning as well - but didn't hear back from her. Which is fine - I certainly didn't expect an answer from either one. I just wanted them to know they were on my mind and in my prayers.
I am so thankful for everyone who is a part of our group here on DG.......
Everyone does process differently, and sometimes emotions overcome and you just can't talk about it. I lost my first husband 21 years ago, and there were days I just couldn't stop talking, and others that I couldn't manage to talk about him at all. I hope Jeri knows we are here, and thinking of her.
Yes a child touches your life forever regardless of how long they are with you. Richard's son was only 7 months old when he died about 47 years ago. Richard brings him up every couple of weeks and has the 24 years that I have known him. He still talks about some of the things people did for him during that time. His son was ill and in and out of hospitals for the entire 7 months he was alive. He was just talking a few days ago about a friend that gave him his world series tickets to help cheer him up a few months after his son died. I've heard that story I couldn't tell you how many times.
Wouldn't the person who did that Charlotte, be pleased to know that their act of kindness had a lifelong effect? Sometimes I know I try to do things for others and wonder if it has ANY effect or not............. But, I have a friend who also works for AECC in the LR office. When Alex was severely burned, it was a Wed evening, and by early the next morning I was receiving calls from co-workers to check on him, and calls from people in the LR office as well. I will never forget that Thursday afternoon that Judy called to tell me that she had shut her office door and spent her lunch on her knees in prayer for Alex and my family. I had no doubt she meant every word of it and I was so touched by her concern and actions. Her and her husband also came to check on us that Sunday after church. But, her action was more than prayer.... it was a wake up call to me. After that, I didn't just say "I'll prayer for you, or him or whatever in passing"...... I took it as a personal duty to do so. I firmly believe that Alex's healing was a direct answer to prayer for a miracle from hundreds of people, many of whom we didn't and may never know this side of heaven - and therefore I felt I owed it to others to pay it forward so to speak and take my prayers for others much more serious. We had several acts of kindness bestowed on us during that time - but one of the others that impacted me the most was from a woman that I didn't personally know. Her son in law was severely injured after being ran over by a vehicle while he was on a 3 wheeler. Her SIL and daughter had only been married about 6 - 8 weeks when the accident occurred. But the accident had taken place about 2 yrs before Alex was burned. The SIL and daughter lived with her and her husband because the boy, Wayne, was bed bound and her daughter dropped out of college to care for him every day. Anyway, the family was in the process of trying to raise about $ 150,000 for Wayne to undergo some special oxigenation treatment that insurance wouldn't cover to hopefully get him more use of his limbs and speech, etc. One day at the hospital I received a card from her with 20.00 cash inside. My sister happened to be there to tell me WHO the woman was, because I didn't even recognize her name. I had known Wayne's parents for years, but didn't really know her. My sister and I both were in tears that she would send us 20.00 when we both knew they were trying to raise thousands to help him. I truthfully thought it was an amazing act of kindness as well as an act of faith. They did go on to raise all the money they needed for the treatment...................
Happytail, sorry to hear of your loss. I totally understand what you mean though. When my Dad died I was the same way................some days I could talk about him, some days I could only cry. That went on for so many months that I really thought some thing was seriously wrong with me and that I might have to have professional help. But, a dear friend told me that everyone dealt with grief differently, and I had to give myself time to recover....and she was right. Eventually things did get a little better every day.............I am not one to say that time heals the wound..... I just think the scab gets thicker and you are more used to the pain. Not sure it ever goes completely away - just my opinion.
Even years after the death of a child, or any loved one for that matter, there are times when you can talk about that person and enjoy the memories and other times when the grief comes flooding back. My son has been gone for 33 years and I still never know when the tears will start flowing. If I am alone, I just let them flow but if I am with a group, I just change the subject because tears make a lot of people uncomfortable, for some reason. Maybe it is because they don't know how to comfort the person who is experiencing the grief and wish they could do something to make it better.
Just knowing that people care and will be there for you is what really counts. :)
We never know what simple comment brings comfort. My first cousin died in a horrible accident at work when he was a young father. The first of my 1st cousins to go. He left behind a young wife and an 8 year old son and 5 year old daughter. That funeral has always just been etched in my mind. The first cousin was much older than me and his 8 year old son is now 58. Several months ago he posted a picture from when his dad was in World War II. Don't remember what he said but I could just tell he was missing his dad. I just made the comment that of all the funerals I have been to at my age his dad's funeral has always stood out in my mind. That just happened to be the exact thing he needed to hear. I certainly didn't know that. He told me how much he appreciated me letting him know that and that he had had someone else tell him the same thing just a few weeks before. He said that it had always stood out in his mind and that it really meant a lot to him to know that I felt the same way, He went on to remind me that he was only 8 when his dad died.
Dear friends and gardening family, I thank each of you for the love and support that I have received!!! It is very hard for me right now to be very eloquent and I'm not sure even if I'm making complete sentences. Our hearts are broken!!! Not only are we dealing with the loss of Cameron but the whole ordeal has brought flooding back the agony that we thought was tucked away from the loss of our daughter. To know 1st hand what Terrie is getting ready to face breaks my heart that we cannot spare her any of this!!!
It so happened that we had to meet with the funeral director at noon yesterday when Yall did the group prayer and the way things progressed so smoothly I know it was the result of my prayer warriors!!! My entire family was so moved by Yall!!!! I will never be able to repay Yall for your kindness to my family.
I want to share something that happened here in Baton Rouge about the same time that Yall did the group prayer and each of you can see how strong the effect and evidence of that prayer.
http://www.wafb.com/story/25966868/baton-rouge-restaurant-employee-finds-god-in-sliced-eggplant
God shows Himself in all of nature, I see Him in the majestic mountains, the rose blooms, all of nature reminds me if His love and kindness. I am not surprised He showed Himself in an eggplant !
While we know the whole family is heartbroken, I think next to you and Jim my hear breaks for his little sister. It is hard enough for adults, she is still just a child.
Yes and I'm really worried about the wake and funeral!!! It's gonna be hard enough for our family & friends but I'm scared how all the young people that have never experienced death in their lives will handle this.
I know he had lots of young friends, how is the passenger that was with him doing now?
Don't forget to take good care of yourself, how is Mary holding up?
Jeri, I so wish that I lived close enough to both you and Trish to come and put my arms around you and just hug you tight. Words are so inadequate at a time like this but it is good to know that you are feeling our prayers hugging you. We will continue to pray that you will feel the Lord's comfort, encouragement and strength in the days and weeks to come.
Jeri, I will also be praying for the young people that will be attending Cameron's memorial service. May they feel the peace of God enfolding them and may you and your family feel that peace as well.
I have also worried his sister and Ashley as well. Although Ashley was certainly too young to remember anything just being faced with another death of someone so close to her I'm sure is very hard for her. It's never easy to deal with but it is especially hard when you are young.
Jeri praying for strength and comfort for all of you.
Wow that was amazing . Jeri. You know God leads our hand in so many ways that when we look back we are in awe of the path that was lit up like a airport runway. Personally I had been off Daves Garden for 2 years. I was online one night less than a month ago when something told me go over to Daves and join back up. Midsouth has always been my family since July 2006. Jeri and I joined within 1 day of each other that July. This has been the most amazing group of friends that I feel God has put together. He led me here that first July just as he led me back .
Wow! Imagine just doing an everyday chore and finding God! Jeri, so good to hear from you. We have all wanted to reach out and hug you! Have also been worried about Ashley, his sister, and the other young people Cameron was close to. I hope they will find peace and comfort too. Will continue to pray for everyone tomorrow as we know it will be hard.
So glad you are back, Cindy, missed you terribly. like Charlotte said we blow 20.00 every day, as long as I have it I intend to stay with DG.
They showed the eggplant on 5 tonight as a teaser to the news ! I just love it when Christian things show up on TV !
Sorry wrote the last post hours ago .
I have also been thinking of the young people but they are stronger than most of us give them credit. Counseling as a whole family may help them cope.
Sandra you told me years ago you felt your ministry was going to be on the internet. I see it manifested here and on Facebook ( that wasn't around back then) . You grow more each day in your faith and walk.
Cindy, thank you for that comment, but I do so little I get ashamed sometimes.
He has done and continues to do so much for me.
Cindy, it is so good to have you back with us here on Mid-South. It seems for some reason that we have all gotten so busy these last couple of years but we should always remember our good friends here on DG. You folks were so supportive of me when Buddy died. How can I do any less for those of us who are experiencing tragedy now?
Jeri, that was an amazing story about the man who "found God"! HE works in mysterious ways. . .!
Sandra, the Lord has given you a lovely gift to be able to put things into words in such a kind and wonderful way. You always seem to have just the right thing to say when foks are going through difficult times. I, for one, have been tremendously blessed many times over by your comforting words at various times through the years.
I appreciate so much all the friendships I have formed by being a member here on DG. The Lord continues to do so much for and in each of us. We never get too old to grow in our faith.
I had to look back to see exactly when I joined DG, but it was also 2006. Don't remember what month, but somehow I found the MSG group not too long after that when I was browsing around. I think I had probably lurked around for a while, reading the posts, and finally jumped in. I had been on the other garden website (and still am some) for a while but it was way too serious, and folks over there don't post much or chat. I also was looking for pond & bluebird information at the time and some other specific things so was really concentrating on that more and then joined in this forum. Then several of us finally met up in Nashville for a few years and that was that! Hard to believe it's been that long!
I too appreciate so much the opportunity we've had to meet each other and hope we'll finally all get to meet one day. There is something so comforting to know I can depend on y'all to understand if I need to vent or that someone, usually Sandra that's right, will have just the right thing to say. You are right, Marilyn, we never get too old to grow in our faith and meet new friends.
Jeri, it is so good to hear from you, and to see that encouraging story that you shared! God works in such wonderful ways. I am sure some of the young people will struggle with the service and the realization that life is precious and sometimes way too short. Some of them have never had to deal with loss before. I pray that those that don't know Christ will be awakened by the reality of life and loss. It would be awesome if the church or someone could offer some counseling to those who need help coping with it. Around here if the person is still in school, they have counselors come into the school to try to assist the friends and family. Continuing to pray for you and for your family.
Cindy, we surely have missed you here on DG. You are so good with your words..........you should consider writing a book!
I am so thankful for all of my DG friends......actually, I just consider ya'll my extended family. It is pretty amazing when I think about a gardening website - and originally a search for information about a plant - leading me to such a wonderful group of friends! I have no doubt that was directly from God as well! ^_^
Hugs to everyone!
Genna
Elaine, we cross posted................. I just went to look and I joined in May 2007. It was a little while before I found the MS forum, and could learn to navigate my way around. I believe it was May 2008 when I attended my first RU at Debra's house and got to meet some people in person! Not positive of the year............
I believe it was last June that I last got to see anyone in person.............and I was thinking just last week it is time to get back together!
Amazing group..............and I love each of you!
Thank Genna
Let's all remember Jeri , Jim , Mary and family today at 2:00 if you have a minute. I am going to set the alarm on my phone.
Have a blessed day
Through the years I have found there are two types of gardeners, one will give you any and everything they have to share, and the other will guard their plants with a shotgun and never share anything.
This group belongs to the first type and the gardening habits spill over into the rest of their lives.
You have all been a great blessing to me and it brings me great joy when I see your plants growing here with me, it is a little like a visit with each of you.
I saw Trisha has started posting some on FB, I am not sure if she is still a member here or not but I was still glad to hear from her. Lets all remember Jeri's family tonight and tomorrow.
We crossed Cindy, both having the same thoughts !
I know visitation tonight and the service tomorrow will be difficult on them all............. and the many days to come. Continuing to pray for everyone involved.