Illinois Oaks Field Day

Terry-rific! See you then, and Dax too, and maybe Bob -- anyone else? Just think, we all can gossip about the ones who don't show up. I know some juicy tidbits about - - - well, I guess I'd better wait until I'm sure who's not coming!

(Sorry about the nails, but maybe that makes you a little less deadly . . . )

Guy S.

galoob is a good thing.

No Kevin?

I'm wearing speedo's 'rain or shine' - bring your camera's folks! I cannot wait. And Terry - can't wait to meet you! Equil - you a cool chick!

Later -

P.s. Kevin I believe is going to be in good ole Wisconsin at a cottage. Can't wait to meet that guy though. See ya! he he he hehe he heeeh eehehehehhehehee!

And "yes", you'll all be appalled! You think I'm kidding don't ya???

We'll all see about that!

Have a good one! heeeeeheeeeheehehe!

Uh oh, we've created a monster. Who will bring the tarp to toss over the exhibitionist?

Well, I guess it will be my duty to become a human tarp if that will make Equil happy. I will toss myself over Dax at the slightest hint of exhibitionism (is that a word?). I'm just trying to envision the Marlboro Man wearing a speedo. Hmmm.....made to look like flannel? The feelings mutual Dax, I can't wait to meet you either. And it's been a while since I've since the other big (tall) rugged guy.

Kevin and Bill are both going to Wisconsin?

I've always been one Equil. An employee at the college I went to used to call me the president of the naked people club (I can't imagine why he'd do so except for the fact that he found me face down without clothing - I still to this day have no idea why I was walking home in the nude - there lying in his lawn as he was about to head to work cooking breakfast for us kids) This must have happened 100 times in college. Often me and my buddy 'Fubar' ('Fumbled' Up Beyond All Recognition) 100% nekkid on a bet for an entire evening... crazy - Another time my mother came to my door with me an Fubar wearing only a pair of green shaded 70's glasses, I think I broke me mommies poor little heart. A house full of people and her son at the front door of her rental home with me chasing people 'wearing only "the" cowboy boots'. oh.... what am I missing, it's no fun to grow up I guess! I take that back. Maybe I'm now, just remembering the best of both worlds - what I have now, and what it used to be like killing brain cells night after night on purpose. I actually graduated with a 2.8 from a private college - of course with nothing other than a Swedish Language Major of which I can barely ask for "help"! Maybe there's a reason why I got into gardening - I was a real wild machine back in my days. I suppose that's why my old man nicknamed me "Turk" or "Stallion". What a long strange trip it's been thanks to my old friend, the late Jerry Garcia! Terry - I think I may have you whipped as far as wildness goes. OR 'idiocracy' to some- "Fun"! I regret nothing of course.

Onto another subject - thanks Guy S. for the camping invite - cool.

I think I might now just wear my normal getup which of course anybody with 'class' (which I no longer own!) - knows that he (or she) with the largest hawaiian shirt collection at death is the winner of life. I can't believe I was actually going to do this, really I was. I'm pretty embarrased now of course - You ladies are PURE EVIL! Sorry Terry - the Marlboro Man will have to rest his speedo for another sizzling adventure - like going to a public pool! geez.........

Guy S. I'm back in line with the fellas now. Terry, The Marlboro Man has just distinguished his cigarette. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, I meant extinguished!

Grimy Cheers,

Dax

I was a boring child, teenager, and young adult.

Evilalbisia, I don't believe it! But ,of course, you are making up for lost time now....
Dax, I think I know you, or atleast your soul mate, I had an equally fun childhood, HEHEHE.
Terry, The Human Tarp, that's a great handle. So, what were you planning to cover up on Dax anyway...

Finally, I wish I could come. This sounds like too much fun and hysteria. Please take lots of pictures and post them. A qroup shot standing around the "Abomination" would be terrific! If you were all naked that would even be better...

Sorry dear, I truly was that boring. I was a... dare I say it... dweeb.

This whole thing is starting to sound like Woodstock.
Maybe we'll name it Oakstock!

Equil was the poor girl cowering in the corner while I danced on the table tops. Why Patrick, what do you think I was going to cover up?

Dax Baby! Say it ain't so....I was so looking forward to meeting the Marlboro Man in all his glory. You could wear those speedo's under your jeans ya know. Just for fun....there is a creek after all.........please don't break another girls heart.

Any Guy, yoowhoo, Gu-yyyy, my email is fixed at last. At least on OE anyway, the other program won't work. So who knows how to get spell check on OE. And please don't tell me to just click on tools and click the spell tab. It isn't highlighted, it ain't there.

Hey you were typing while I was!

They say opposites attract and maybe this is why I like you so much,

Guy, 'The Human Tarp' is threatening to take another man to the creek! No Respect, I tell you, NO Respect!

OakStock is wonderful name for an annual get together at your place. Can we make this an annual event?

I'll be sure to bring my beerbong. We could hoist some rascal up into an Oak with brewski's and have them pour away! I'll of course bring the music - hip hop, the blues, reggae, and some Jimmy Buffet for us Parrotheads in hawaiian gear. After a few slingshot beers, I'll whip out the grafting knife and put on a show! Blindfolded naturally of course.

That's going to be one heck of a weiner roast! I'll probably end up grafting a braut to a seedling, now takes skill beyond any of you table dancing amateurs out there.

Oh - just when I think I'm going to be shunned, I actually don't need to skip the event! I thought for sure, today, this thread would be inactive and I'd feel like some sort of FREAK!

There's always another time! - "Oakstock" - now that' s bad. Real bad. Real real real bad!
Too many hearts - not enough time!

The Marlboro Men.

Look what you stumbled into annually hosting Guy. Count me in next year, and looks like you will need one more evildweeb to balance me out :) Hope that fescue can handle all the abuse.

Bill

I'll bring her a shirt and *s*h*a*d*e*s* for evening wear of course only! She will now be addressed as 'Grasshopper'!

P*I*M*P* & D*I*A*M*O*N*D*S - E*Q*I*L* -

Pickles (my frat nickname) - LATER FOOLS! heeeeeeeeeheeeeeeeeeeeeeeehehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhheeehheheeheh!

Why Bill, are you a dweeb too? That will be two of us for balance at the second annual OakStock. Surely there are more dweebs out there, we just can't allow the wildthings to reflect negatively on poor old Goey.

No, no, no Equil. I am with Pickles on this one. The only dweeb part about me is gardening, my culinary skills (or is that effeminate), and all things dungeons and dragons (just kidding about that). Otherwise no dweeb here, barring The Lord of the Rings or Star Wars of course :)

I was saying you need an extra dweeb to even me out, maybe 2 for Pickles.

Willis

Hey THT, you could use the "Abomination: as a pole for one of your "MOVES".
Gosh, this is going to be such a lose to miss. Maybe I could just show up and sleep in my Van, Saturday night. Guy, can I bath in your creek? Up stream from THT and 'Pickles' Of course....

Oh man, I feel so aaaaaaalone in this thread. Is there no one else who is even a borderline dweeb?

And Terry dear, there is absolutely positively no way you would have gotten me up on a table to dance... moves or no moves. No way, no how and you can take that to the bank even though I know how to ballroom dance quite well (ducking here but it's the truth). You've met me, can you envision me dancing on a table top? Table tops are for spreads of food. Now, if the table was loaded with food and you were dragging me up to be the centerpiece to do a java the hut (sp?) type move to have my own personal gorge fest... well that would be another story.

The abomination is too big. Won't work. Guy's got some other oaks though that are a lot smaller/thinner, they just might work. Geez, I thought all guys liked to rough it. Like not taking baths or showers for a week. What's up Patrick? And come on, why upstream? You and The Marlboro Man can rough it side by side, just like real he-men do.

Equil, you bet your fanny I would of gotten you up there. I can envision some of my best guy friends giving you a heave hoe up there. Yep. Please, everybody knows bar/club tables are not for food! But just for you, the table is filled with Thin Mints and to have 1, you have to get up there and move. Go with the music, just move with it....yea, yea, there you're getting it........

Guy is so gonna regret posting this event..........

Not even for Thin Mints would I writhe around on a table as even I can get my fill of those sooner or later. You probably could haul me up there if I had dozed off somewhere as I do have a tendency of being out for the count once I fall asleep but I tell ya dancing on a table top would not be me. I am more into spectator sports. This OakStock is beginning to sound an awful lot as if it would be a great spectator sport for me.

Goey, I am getting this visual and I want to share it with you. You are going to have all these professors and at least one college president (I'll take the liberty of referring to them as dweebs like me) and then there will be the DG clan minus me and evidently I would have been the only DG dweeb. Oh lordie lordie lordie, talk about mixing the Hatfields and the McCoys. Anyway, I'll presume that somebody is going to donate a keg and we all know what happens when folk get liquored up so there's no need to provide a visual there. The bonfire will be piled so high that the fire will be out of control with sparks flying and burning holes in people's clothing (I know for a fact you have one person coming whose nickname is pyro and he's known to add to fires without permission to get a good blaze) and I'm thinking it's going to be all downhill from there being as how we DGrs do have a unique sense of humor that might not be appreciated by most.

Oh Goey, I feel for you hon... I really do.

Oh Terry, are you trying to get me excited? Oooooooooooooooo yea baby yea!!! As far as not bathing for a week, Hmmm, that may be your idea of a good time, but I never learned to appreciate that level of ripeness, not even during the 60's. Everything is always more tasty when its washed. Even Racoons know that!

Hey Guy, do we really have to be well behaved? And I was just getting ready for a "DEER CAMP" experience. And if 'Hawaiian' is the mode of dress, are you going to pass out grass skirts and cocoanut shells at the door? And everyone gets layed, right? Maybe I'll bring my yuke! Just imagine the collage president's solo on the high part to "the Lyon sleeps tonight", accumpanied by a bunch of drunks repeating:
A-winga-went, a-winga-went, a-winga-went, a-winga-went, a-winga-went, a-winga-went, a-winga-went, a-winga-went. Bliss! Toss another log on the fire, pyro!

Evilabizia, did you get my D mail? And even more important, did you spill the beans? You naughty little Dweeb, you. I bet THT could get you up on that table, but you better be sporting those colored rubber Garden boots or Goey will be way disappointed. Come to think of this could be the cover shoot for the October issue of "horticulture"...

Hey Dax, Frat boy?!? How'd you get the nickname 'Pickles" anyway? That has got to be a good story.
Hmmm, I have got to make this party... Guy, you'll know me when the green Caravan pulls up your drive with the "don't move firewood, it BUGs Me" Bumpersticker...

Animal House, that's what this shin dig is going to turn into replete withTerry being delivered somewhere via shopping cart while Bill plays the "guess what I am game" before popping his own cheeks as others gather around sufficiently sloshed in togas. Oh what fun!

Gosh Guy, you'll be the talk of the town for years after you host this event.

Animal House? How 'bout Revenge Of The Nerds II?
Yea, you would. You'd be in the moment and before you know it, yep, you're writhing on the table. More like gyrating, I'd say.

No Patrick, go back up and look at how roughing it to me is in a trailer with a toilet, a shower, a sink, air conditioning, heat if needed etc. I thought he-men did the no shower for a week while roughing it. I remember my dad coming home from fishing in Canada. Not only did he stink, but he had a full beard and mustache. Every year, 2 times a year for I don't remember how many years. Can we come up with a better song than the lion sleeps tonight? Something by Aerosmith perhaps? Maybe Pink? Walk This Way? Dream On? I Don't Want To Miss A Thing? Pink it´s my new obsession
Pink as the bing on your cherry
Pink ´cause you are so very
Pink it´s the color of passion
`Cause today it just goes with the fashion
Pink it was love at first sight, yea
Pink it was love at first sight
Pink when I turn out the light
Pink gets me high as a kite
And I think everything is going to be all right
Pink is my favorite crayon, yeah
Pink it was love at first sight
Pink when I turn out the light
Pink it´s like red but not quite
And I think everything is going to be all right

I have a grass skirt and a coconut! Man, I'm all set.

Who's Goey? (other than the tabletops I used to dance on...)

Goey = Guy since he acts all sentimental and mushy and gets defensive when anyone talks negatively about his Mimosa, Sawtooth Oak, Norway Maple, Golden Raintree, Castor aralia, as well as a few other highly invasive species oops specimens that he claims to have sentimental attachments to that he just can't bring himself to remove. Rumor has it that his Castor is a monster.

You'll need to bring two coconuts to OakStock dear, one won't work for what they had in mind.

editing to add his Siberian Elm that was the only plant growing in his Uncle's barren landscape so he just had to germinate some seed of that seed to bring home and plant as a memorial to his dearly departed Uncle.

This message was edited Sep 1, 2006 6:14 PM

I'll hafta do the "A-Went-Away" part cuz I'd never hit the "In the jungle" high notes, and anybody who trashes my party will be the one wenting away, head first! And Evil, you forgot my uncle's Ulmus pumila . . .

But if y'all wanna do an Oakstock next year, let's start planning now so Bill and Patrick et al. can pencil in the date! Maybe TerrieR will have Evil pole-dancing by then . . . and if you two grow your hair long enough you won't need any coconuts at all.

Guy S.

I better get the party out of me before I show up!

Maybe I'll just teepee your trees instead - and burn rubber with Bill and Patrick on the way out!

I do have a 'Portland Trailblazers' bumper sticker on my van!

Guy, if you own at least one hawaiian shirt, you're IN! If you own at least three pair of speedos, then you the man. What a hoot - Women, oak pole dancing, The Marlboro Men, Professors, music - just like my college experience!

Terry and Equil - I'll bring a pole for the two of you to dance on! Revenge of the Nerds! Now that's something I remember! Those quiet, crazy, party animals! I'll bet Equil was once a blonde, hmmmmmmm.

Pickles - your athlete gone BADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD! Whoooohoooohoooooooooooooo!

P.s. Is it alright if the Marlboro man has dreadlocks?

I was just wondering where Viburnum King has been??? Last time I checked, his member photo had a wine filled table.

Amateurs...

Dax

Hey Guy- Deficiency noted and post edited to include your Siberian Elm. Now, seems to me I remember some exotic Viburnum that were getting kinda weedy and we're showing up on a few hall of shame lists. If I missed anything else, just let me know. I'll take care of it real fast.

Nope, no pole dancing for me either. I'd put that right up there with dancing on tables. I'll bring my own folding chair and watch the show though.

Actually Dax, I was born a white blond but over the years it darkened up. Nothing that can't be taken care of with a bottle.

Oh I can't wait for photos of this blessed event!

Hey Marlboro -- I believe I can find a nice Kalopanax pole for them to use . . . that oughta make 'em squeal!

But not this time -- we gotta be serious this time.

Can I use an authentic Samoan tapa-print shirt?

Guy S.

Yup, that would make me squeal alrightie but not exactly with delight. I'll make a deal with ya Goey, you nuke the Mimosa and stump it down to 6' so it's all ready for OakStock '07 and Terry and I will dance around it like it was a May Pole. How's that big boy?

Good thing I am missing the academia. I paid my dues at U of I and don't need any dean or president checking into my official record at this point (Pickles isn't the only one that had a wild streak). Next Sept works great for Oakstock, the calendar is wide open. Will it be adults only, or just the evening portion? Maye we can do a burning man thing with the Elm or Mimosa. Pickles and Terry can do the naked dancing part. I think we will need to bring in some port-a-potties and a water line to make it legit. Central Illinois hasn't seen anything like this since Lincoln / Douglas.

Bill

You guys have been busy! I'll start with Equil, you take the one lone coconut and you split it. Then you have two halves or shells. One for each. Got it now?

I have firmly planted Goey into my brain if some guy dares to call on me during this event for an ID.

About your supposed Kalopanax pole, yea right. I'm just sorry about this phrase I found regarding the alledged Kalopanax The stems are often spiny, with stout spines up to 1 cm long.........please tell Edie how very sorry I am..........

I think I've got the coconut deal down pat but I think I'll leave that one to others to experiment with.

Hmmm, I take it you wondered why I swapped back to a Mimosa Pole from a Kalopanax Pole and you did a little bit of Internet searching. That's my girl!