That is just a piece of "soapstone" I found in the creek bed. (Not sure what we call "soapstone" in this area is what others mean by "soapstone.") I liked the shape and I thought the gray-green color would look o.k. The copper bird was the top of a brass lamp in its former life. A place for the birds to hang out in the center of the bath was safer for them when Amargia still had a cat. Our cat didn't think any bird was worth getting wet for.
Got the banana trees under control today. I like keeping it down to one or two strong trunks. It is a Cavendish with a wine colored trunk and splotches of the same color on the leaves. Maybe, I can find new homes for the babies.
Practical Matters for Physically Challenged Gardeners
All right I'm BACK! I'm giving the sermon this Sunday (yikes) and I was working hard on that and then I thought I had tendonitis! The sermon has had its thousandth rewrite and I'm leaving it as it is.
(I've been on the Worship Committee for years - we do a few services a year - occasionally some lay person will give a "sermon" although I think it's not officially a sermon if a lay person gives it. Anyway I was drafted, because it had to be about FORGIVENESS and Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur and forgiveness is something I've been thinking about a lot this summer. I think the types of issues I was thinking about this summer were way too personal to speak about publicly, so I used an example from my distant past of someone I'm trying to forgive. The guy who lives next door used to own a pit bull, which attacked and bit my daughter when she was seven - in my heart, I still hold it against him. I figured it was a clear-cut example of "forgive him because he's a jerk and knows knot what he does." Anyway, that's where I've been.)
EVERYBODY is welcome in my choir. I don't care if your tone-deaf or literally Deaf, if you can produce a sound we can use you. Jim and Kay, when's the wedding? I'll be there with bells on, as long as I can bring my DH. We plan to get married again next summer on our tenth anniversary. We figure we spent soooo looooong married to the wrong people, we want to celebrate every minute together.
I know where you are coming from when it comes to forgiveness. You've done better than I did. It took me years of struggle to learn forgiveness is the intelligent and logical choice. As well as the moral and ethical one. (..... and I still have occasional relapses.)
Renewing your vows after 10 years, that sounds wonderful. Too many couples take each other for granted. Jim and I had a very small, no-frills wedding. My daughters think their mother getting married should be AN EVENT. I think they just want an excuse to party. We are talking about doing a major bash this time next year to celebrate a major stage of completion for Amargia, if nothing else. This is the most beautiful time of year here. You are all invited. We are talking about having some sort of yearly celebration. Maybe, a Muscadine Festival. Muscadines, Native American grapes, Southern Fox Grapes, Scuppernongs....whatever you want to call them. Their harvest is as good a reason as any to celebrate. *Kay*
P.S. Carrie, What's this I hear about you taking a walk?
Oh ... well, yeah. With a hip-high locking brace on my right leg and a knee high brace on my left leg (AFO), a rolling walker and a PT, I took a short walk. Very short. Maybe 15-20 feet, 45 min (lots of breaks, more breaks than walks!), I took a series of short walks again today. (Takes a bow.)
There are still people, Kay, I can't forgive; I'm no paragon of virtue.
The applause is deafening. Your audience cries “Encore! Encore!” :-)
*blushes* thank you.
I was way behind on reading the DG Newsletter. Been catching up. An article on Purple Heart and Purple Queen Tradescantia pallida caught my attention. The combo below is in the V.I. (visually impaired) flower garden. High contrast is what appeals to people with poor eyesight. This combination makes an unusual, high drama fall combination. The exuberant growth of the purple Wandering Jew doesn’t seem to bother the spider lilies at all. *Kay*
I do hope this is the right pic. A blind person submitting a picture is always a chancey.
Kay, a very good picture. If you can't see than you must have a bit of the ESP.
Carrie, So glad you're back. Missed you. Am so proud for you, both for sticking to the sermon and the walk. Some of the best sermons i 've heard came from laymen.
I have a hard time with forgiveness too. I could use the sermon. I think i have it licked sometimes and that ugly headed demon comes back to haunt me and i have to work on it again for awhile.
The ones i have the most trouble with is mostly from when i was small.
Kay, I'm going to start saving my money for the wedding at Amargia. Hey Carrie, We invited to yours?
You have banana trees? My neice had one in the valley. but finally got tired of it. She even got a couple of bananas from it once. Was never really tempted much to try one. I thought about it after reading an article here at DG about someone who was an expert at it. But i have just too many irons in the fire.
Had to take my Cricket to the vet this morning. I found a FLEA! And she was scratching.The vet said she must have picked it up from a passing wild critter. We restarted her on Revolution.(thought i'd save some money) She also gave Cricket some anti itch meds. OH the joy of being a pet mom.
There are audio labels on the computer photos, but I'm always afraid I'm going to blunder it when there is nobody around to double check my work. Like the time I bought two pairs of shoes in different colors but an identical style. Went to church with one red shoe and one black shoe on. As blind folks say.... ABAPITA!!! (Ain't Blindness A Pain In The......Anatomy.)
So, are you going for the whole "Bride-zilla" package, Carrie? Or, a little more low key?
Bananas can handle winter outside here so their not too much trouble. I do dig out the new pups every year because a tree form shows off their trunk color better. Working on bamboo today. It IS trouble to keep up with, but is not just for looks. It is the very large timber bamboo used for construction. A source of funds for Amargia.
Revolution is what we use for our dogs. Tried an herbal flea repellent that smelled heavily of cloves. The dogs hated it though. They smelled like Christmas pudding. LOL. *Kay*
Our original wedding was at our local church with probably about 30 people.
My ex was supposed to pick up the kids after the wedding (which I think was in the morning; I was a morning person then). Then there was a light sit-down lunch, that's all there was. So he should have picked them up at maybe 2 pm. We didn't have music or a photographer or anything. (We had disposable cameras, but mostly the kids took pictures of each other.) So by maybe 6, we called my mother and she came and picked up my kids. Our honeymoon was one $100 night in a hotel from priceline. (Very luxurious for us at the time!) Thanks to my ex, we wasted most of our honeymoon waiting for Mr. No-show to show.
Our fifth anniversary was on a Saturday, so bingo, we had a party, we restated our vows, invited the same 30 people, more or less, added some, subtracted some, had it in our back yard.
Our 10th anniversary is on a Friday, so we will probably celebrate Saturday. EVERYONE IS INVITED!
Sat. August 21 Milton MA
This time it is going to be a big party.
For our honeymppn we're going to Europe, maybe Spain.
http://www.ada.gov/business/retail_access.htm
This is fantastic! I have to print it and keep a few in my car to distribute!
You're right. Fantastic! Make sure you take some to hospitals. Here they are the most accesable unfriendly places around. Parking spaces are farther from door tham anyplace else. going down long halls are a nightmare. elevators are always too crowded and hard to get into.
Thanks for that, I've been fighting with Home Depot about their seasonal garden center for 2 years, they cover the close up parking with plantings surrounded by cinder block/landscape timber barriers. The closest parking is at the front door, no where near the garden center.
LOL Kathy, What you do is go in the front door. Grab an electric cart and take off to the garden center. Telling someone in charge "I would'nt have to use this if i could park back here." Which i would anyway but thats beside the point.
I just came from the container gardening forum. Found the neatest idea for a container that should work well for us. An old purse bought for a dollar. There's a picture included. I love it. you can hang that bugger anywhere you want, and it is'nt heavy.
http://davesgarden.com/community/t/1042134/
Edited- I could'nt get this to link but i trippled checked and it should be right.
Vickie
This message was edited Sep 27, 2009 11:15 AM
Thanks for that link, Carrie. I'm an easy-going sort who likes to avoid confrontations. Now, I can just find the person in charge, smile and hand them a copy.
My darling, dearest has no problem with confrontations. I told her once, "You can catch more flies with honey, than with vinegar. She replied, "Who the *#^! WANTS flies! (Jim)
My abusive ex- used to give me that line ALL the time, Jim, when I was confronting him about his abusive behavior. I love vinegar.
cando, that is a good idea, and I will HAVE to have a staff member push a cart because I always buy more than what fits into the little basket. Lowe's works with me as soon as I walk in the door, I've stopped shopping at HD because of it.
Glad to see more than one of us can fill up those little baskets. specially garden stuff. I like Lowes better too. They told me once i could park right in front of their door literally. But then i buy everything for the house there too. Only thing i had trouble with was a vacuum cleaner.
Spain! I would even be willing to fly for that and I hate flying.
I know the garden departments of the big box stores are getting a lot of bad press in some garden magazines, but I've never had a problem with them. The plants I've bought have been healthy, and you can't beat the prices. I believe in supporting my local small nurseries, but I think there is a little plant snobbery going on in the media. I buy from the BB's garden department, a nearby nursery and online sources and most gardeners I know do likewise. I don't see where its hurting small nurseries that have good business sense. My local nursery carries an entirely different line of plants than the BB's.
I have to ask everyone this. Do your pets get mail addressed to them? Mail from the vet, the major pet stores and the like.. I had to laugh Saturday when my dogs got more mail than I did. *Kay* .
Kay, I shop multiple places, too: Online for most of my seed needs if I want anything but the basics, box stores for small shrubs and soil, and a local nursery for the beds at church if I need more than what I have grown. I've found Lowe's a good source for some perennials, and watch their clearance racks like a hawk in the fall. I've purchased nice size perennials for pennies because they have finished blooming. A nice hair cut and water, they are as good as new for next year's flowers.
I do the same as you two do, shop everywhere. We have a good local nursery, Can't wait for those sales at all the box stores, I bought a white muskadine at lowes abt 10 years ago. I know that plant was a hybred of kudzu. It has spread everywhere and the birds and critters always beat me to it anyway.
Carrie, I love these abuseres idea of everyone has to be nice to me and anything i do or say to you is AOK!!!!
Or, Vickie, if only you were nice to me I wouldn't have to hit you! Bullies.
I wish I could shed revealing light on why some men are abusive. But, as much as I’ve seen, it is still largely a mystery to me. I can give you some how-to on recognizing them while they are still at arm’s length though. I have heard men talk who turned out to be abusive. Talk in an unguarded way in the absence of women which might reveal something new.. They often sound like they are almost afraid of women on some very deep level. Others sound like they have an outright hatred of women. Often centered on a specific woman. (mother, ex-wife, whatever) In either case, they talk like women are creatures totally separate and different from men. I don’t mean the natural things we all make jokes about, I mean like women belong to a different species and aren’t fellow human beings. Much the way a racist talks about members of the hated race. Abusive men aren’t always easy for women to spot from a distance,, but those are some traits to watch for. If a trusted man (brother, father, male friend) tells you to be wary, please listen! Abusive men are more likely to show their true faces to other men. These jerks have learned to slip under women’s radar systems. You can’t trust women’s instinct on this.
I’m not a biological father, but there are eight young women who are the daughter’s of my hearth and heart. (Kay’s three and Amargia’s children) I consider spotting and scaring off the creepy-crawly types part of my job. Emotionally vulnerable young women seem to draw them, the way blood in the water draws sharks. So I’ve had to give some serious thought to this over the last 9 years. I don’t know how to change the men. The only thing I know to do to improve things is to give women the info they need to recognize and avoid them. It is tough going though. The very male traits that romantic, inexperienced, young women find appealing are the male traits they should be most wary of
We are working on processing the harvest today. Mostly tomatoes. As predicted, everyone is a little burnt out on eating them fresh. (Jim)
Thats good advice Jim. Now how to tell about women who'll abuse men.The few i've known seem(like the men) totally absorbed with themselves.
I did'nt get my house plants in yesterday and the temp forecast has dropped from 45 to 38. So i'm keeping an eye on the temps and will try to bring some in if it gets low. It's 50 now at 3:00 AM. So don't think it'll get in the 30,s
Those tomatoes you harvest will sure taste good this winter.
Everyone have a great day tomorrow.
Vickie
Yes, yes, how to get the women to listen? I saw the same things in my sister that I saw in myself; because her husband is "only" psychologically abusive, in very subtle ways (not unlike my father), she's been with him for ~20 years. They live in Italy, so we can't get to her easily. I feel almost lucky that my ex-husband was cut and dried physically abusive, so I didn't have much soul-searching to do. It got so it was about the safety of my kids. My sister just told me (secretly, so don't be telling everyone) that she thinks she will leave him when she is 50.
Very interesting insights, Jim. Really. I wish I could be a fly on the wall.
Oh, I wish I could have 2 of my friends talk to your sister; they waited until the kids were out of the house. Then the kids told her they wished she had left earlier and taken them with her. They are like new women. Hey sis, Don't Wait for 50!
I just wrote her a letter to that effect!
Here is an idea for dealing with that frustrated feeling when women you care about who are in abusive situations won't take the necessary action. Reach out to the ones who are taking action. It might inspire the ones who hesitate. There are a couple of ways you can bring your passion for gardening and your concern for women in abusive situations together.
In this area, there is a poinsettia sale every holiday season. The proceeds going entirely to the local women’s shelter. There is no particular reason you would have to limit yourselves to poinsettias. Any plant or craft item that would sell well would work.
Most women’s shelters get their food from local food banks. You can usually arrange to make more direct contributions from your garden. It is best to find out what they actually use that you can grow.
Many of these women have come out of VERY ugly situations. Don’t underestimate the contribution of a little beauty to their lives. Landscaping plants and fresh flowers do make a difference.
If you do contact a shelter to ask if there is anything you can do, don’t be surprised if they appear to be distrustful and keep you at a distance in the beginning. Such as asking you to deliver things to their office or the police department.. And not telling you the physical location of the shelter. That is normal procedure. The people who operate these shelters have learned from hard experience to be extremely cautious. They won’t trust you just because you are female. In may seem hard for some to believe, but women have betrayed other women in these situations.
My daughters and I made our escape from my first husband many years ago through the assistance of a women’s shelter. We are living proof they can work.
I turned most of yesterday's tomato harvest into "cheatin' sun-dried tomatoes." I did them in the oven, in other words. I was surprised at how well they came out. *Kay*
Thanks Kay for the info on battered womens shelters. I take stuff occasionaly to the police station for them. They are also glad to get just about anything you can donate that can be used in a home. From cleaning supplys to towels and washcloths and blankets, and i sure agree with you that a little beauty is important.
The shelter in the town where my DD lives is really located in another town. Which shows how careful they are.
Our church supports the local (location undisclosed) shelter, and once a year I go through my bathroom and give them all the shampoo, makeup, "personal care items" that nobody used. I always have tons, cause of buying online. I figure some of these brave women may have snuck out in the middle of the night with only the clothes on their backs, If a 99% full jar of moisturizer that didn't work for my skin makes their skin feel better, hurray! Same for fancy shampoo that makes my hair itch, makeup that doesn't go with my skin tone, etc. Especially stuff I buy for my daughter! I have no clue what she might like and I'm wrong as often as I'm right. (She changes her mind, I swear.) I'm hoping some of these woman are more like the age I was and not the age I am now, ha ha, which is way too old.
I swear anyone watching Kay and I trying to work together on a project would think WE were a dysfunctional couple. Our work styles are so different it is hard. My dearly beloved seems to have a holistic approach to any task. She never does just one thing at a time. Something as simple as pruning the grapevines becomes complex with Kay's approach. She turns them into wreaths or whatever, on the spot. Claims it is more efficient. I found her work style complicated even before Tramadol. Now, it is downright confusing. She is always doing a mental juggling act. I just can’t keep that many things going on in my head at the same time. We have come to the conclusion it is best for us to work in a parallel fashion. I built a table on the front porch to conceal the generator, while she pruned the grapes. Close enough we could help one another when asked, but working on separate task.
That is, AFTER we argued it out, and FINALLY agreed the gas generator would get to live on the front porch. We both agree having a generator is necessary in such a storm prone area, but DW objected strenuously to having it on the front porch. I argued it was the only practical place. We FINALLY agreed to let it stay there, if I concealed it somehow. So, it always seems to go. But, I know I would probably find a “Yes, Dear. Whatever you say.” Type woman incredibly boring. And, the compromises we come up with make everything at Amargia work together better in the long run.
I think everyone here know how much you two love to pick at each other. Also know the occasional frustation. (Been there ,done that)
You could always turn her into a Stepford wife.LOL
I don't think Kay can be turned into a Stepford Wife!
She would be the ONE to undo the whole mess.
Help! Help! Its Fall cleaning time. Most people have a Spring cleaning, but we are always too busy in the garden in Spring to think about the house. This means for a week everything here will smell of a dozen different cleaners and be total chaos. It is when we "debate" things and come up with a working plan for the coming year. I read somewhere All Saints Day (Nov. 1) was once celebrated much like New Year's Day. Maybe someone forgot to tell the ladies at Amargia about the change in the calendar? Some of them hagve been around quite a while. They refuse to say exactly how long. (Jim)
Jim, how can we help? Let us know ....
Listen to me complain? I guess. Unless you can tell me how to organize my office so the ladies will be happy and I can still find things? The ladies have a sign in the kitchen, “Boring women have immaculate houses.” I need to create one for my office. Maybe, that one that reads, “An uncluttered desk is the sign of a diseased mind.” That would only protect my desk, though. The best I can do is negotiate a compromise. A dust-free cluttered look for this room. That will hold back the invading hordes who want to “help” me organize my sanctuary. Hold them back until next fall, anyway
I have the south facing window so I can negotiate from a position of strength. Of course, this compromise will mean my office must play host to all the tropical plants this winter. Plants, it seems, do not count as clutter. Or, potting soil as dirt. By January, I will need a machete to get to my desk. Me, Tarzan with computer.
Another few days and the cleaning frenzy will be over. No one is allowed to rest while a single dust bunny survives. It has been a near thing, but I think I’m going to make it
I’m the only one around today with 20/20 vision and a steady hand. We needed to get some hard-to-come- by, very tiny seeds started in containers.. That was my garden task for the day. I just noticed some were Stevia seeds. Isn’t Stevia a tropical? ……meaning some of the pots I just planted will spend the winter in my office? Ar-r-rgh. :-)Jim
I had a Stevia plant, but I missed a few days watering and it shriveled up and died. Most things got too much water, but not that stevia. So it never made it inside.