LA CAFE DE Desperate Gardeners Releiving Stress and Bordeom!

As we open a new the theme song JAWS is playing.... dun dun dun dun dun dun du! PA PAP PA PAHHHHH!!!

Last we left our characters, someone was handing old Blossom here some cucumbers for her bleary eyes as some one un-named smacked her in the face with a mud pie!

Tune in now for a fresh cupppa and some refreshments as we continue the saga of Desperate Gardeners Releiving Stress and Bordeom.

Enter now our new Cafe!

(sound... sqeeeeky door opening....)

We see Cap't Crunch and Cap't Toneal are having a debate....Can you really have your cake and eat it too one sez to the other.....

Well, my Zany mate, just look at yer jaws....


SA-lurrrrp!



Hehehe.. Happy belated birthday.... betchya thought I forgot!




Well mate, looks like we need to go fishing in Kerosene Creek!







Slurp-prizeth!

you know if you fish by the hottest of the springs you can catch your fish already cooked...

Oh yum that sounds like a plan.

(Meanwhile outside the La Cafe de.....there appears to be a croud gathering....)


Pah pah pa PAAAAAA. DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN


Me thinks I will throw you the line! Whose line is it?




Anyway! Do ya think we ought to have a HOE DOWN?

I asked the chaps at work if there were second hand garden tool shops on Manchester St...
(our local red light 'district')
when they asked what I meant I commented that I had heard it was where you find dirty hoes...
they are still shaking their heads.

Well, I met haighrs cheap hoe in the sunflower patch and she said she was a direct twin.

I am still shaking my head!!! LOL

Well, wonder if they will come! I got a dirty hoe back in the woodshed. Really need to clean 'er up. SHe is a wee tad rusty. But rarely used. And oldie but a goodie. Stands on the corner just fine.

I probably ought to make her work the tater patch.

Hello Blossom, .... dalfyre!

Lovely cafe', coffee please!

Hi terri! Meet BLOOMERS! She will be your waitress. Shes haighrs's Cheap Hoes 4th cousin once removed. Haighr does not even know they are related!

Here is your tea list. It has 200 plus one flavours just especially for the chaps and chicks doing tea time. Sorry for the wait, man this new place is getting crouded! We never expected it to go over!

Um, you can hang up your hoe on that hook by your table or there is a spot to lay her down just over yonder. Most folks seem to like the hangers, but some do really prefer the hoe down.

Ok, well, I thought I saw Zany! She got a surprize birthday cake when she walked in and the belated bash started!

Do you deliver? Please may I have my slice of Birthday cake to go. Thanks!

Bloomers says she can wrap it to go...and wants to know if you would like a latte de coffee with it?

Pa pa pa paaaah! DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN!

Oh there goes that dang Jaws theme again! LOL! seems to be stuck!

And whom and where are we delivering? She will twitch her nose and it will get there in a heartbeat or less!!

I wish I had the theme from Jaws in my head today -
instead I had the 'Uncle' song from the Southpark movie!
Not something you want to sing out loud in an RSA :0
My 'boys' would be shocked.

Doncha just hate it when the voices in your head are just a bit daft!!!

Well, looks to be a hot one again. I just took care of the critters and now I am trying to put my feet up for a little bit.

Well, the tune from Jaws aint all that bad until the suspence part scars ya...
Do Do Do





Pa pa pa PAAAAH!

Hey, where did everybody go? Darnit Jaws, you emptied the place out again.

Well, Bloomers, lets say you and me go over to Belles, deliver her a pile of dayliles and see if she has any pank raspberry lemonade. Im out again.

Hey y'all. Wow, sorry I'm late. Been busy sloppin' paint around, taming monkeys, well actually, contracters. Thought I was going to hafta neuter them at first, but couldn't find my snips, so I had to settle it with a rolled up newspaper. Sheesh, they ain't so bright or stubborn, one or the other. But they do understand a pop on the nose. After that, I didn't have to watch my tools like a hawk and I could finally get some work done, swing over here and whip up a few wicked concoctions for y'all.

Well holy crap, now I have Cartman singing Kyle's Mom's song croaking around in my head. Thanks Dalfyre. Thanks so much lol D'hoo

So, what can I getcha?

WoW, I was just about to leave over to Belles...Didja bring any raspbery lemonade?

Bloomers here will take one of your surprize concoctions.

I was busy inventorubg todays bloomers and Well, I hope the new additions please terri.

So the monkeys are acting up? Doncha just hate that. We have yet to ever have a pack of them we could leave to do and trust. Always had to watch them like hawks. The derned flyby nites are the worsts!

I finally fixed the jukebox and now we got more music than Jaws. I thing the OO7 theme is up next or the them from Goldfinger. Everytime I hear that I see the fat man flying out of the winder of the airplane!! ye-aaaah!!!! Oh and that mad man with the teeth.. what was his name? Jeez, memory fails me!!

Oh and here Geek, Bloomers brought this hanging basket for you it has petunias and variagated gingermint in it.

Dang is it a hotty today. Been draggin my wagon and hoses to water.

Yep, its the Goldfinger theme...

And here is a fresh roll of newspaper to swat the monkeys for you again. You tame them girl.

hi
been buiess
have not made any thing
been keeping up with the animal
graden
and hb
still working
o and got a year older
lol lol
elle

DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN Dun



Pa pa pa paaaaaaaaaaah!


Here ya go elle, Happy Birthday, here is a nice peice of Chocolate moose cake!



Hey we missed you! Glad to have you back!



Hey, someone wanna kick that Juke and get the Goldfinger theme back on.. sheeesh, that JAWS theme keeps sneaking back on.

Elle!!! Glad to see ya back. Happy birthday gal. Hugs. Here, I made you a very special brew. The flavor changes everytime you want it to. Lemonade one sip, watermelon the next. Enjoy.

Thanks blossom. The fleurs are right purdy. Love that varigation.

Whump! There, the jukebox is fixed. lol

Yeah, fly-by-nighters ARE the worst for having to fix their messes. Then, the clients follow me around with a magnifying glass. I should put a bumper sticker on my @$$ that reads :if you can read this, you are following too close. Sheesh! lol

I got one on my forehead..wont tell ya what it says but its similiar.. think in reverse! Seems I got a knack of running into buttholes that just gotta have there way with me.

Well shoot ma, time for a hoe down.

Danggggg hot today, gonna be woorse.

Gimme some of that brew you got their neighbor!

hi all
love the message
this heat is kill me
hot tea and cake is fine with me
i will try and write soon
elle

Happy Birthday Elle. It is going to get hot here too - expecting 105 degrees over the weekend.
I have been bringing out these birthday candles lately for everyone's birthday - so here it is for you too! Make a wish and blow them out!

Happy Birthday elle!

hi all
you all are so nice
to this old gal
it suppoes to cool off this coming week
i work a lot this coming three week
the need is there
if i can hold up
i love my work
but it is hard
but i love my people
some one make me a cool picture for i can print it
up and take to show them
elle

Happy Birhday elle!

hi terri
ty for the picture
it cooling off a little here
not doing much beside working
when it get cooler i going to start
makeing thing again
elle

I need to find Geek. One of her python friends has been ignoring my NO SNAKES ALLOWED sign and going into my territory where it it is definitely not welcome. Derned thing was 5 foot long if a day and has dark brown and brown spots on its topside then he gets yellowish and spotted.. ICK anyway, its gotta go before it causes a panick attack amongst the natives and they desert the island here. That rasqual can take all the sparrows it wants as hostage, I dont care, but stay out of the critter house.

That be a ratsnake Blossom. It eats mostly rodents, taking out an entire nest in one sitting when the notion hits. I'll have a word with him, advise him to wear an invisibility cloak. If you have snakes, then you definitely have rodents. I don't know which would be worse for customers to see.

RATS!!!!!! run for it..........

Well, I prefer to see neither. I know we got voles. Them pesky critters are tunneling everywhere. But your buddy definitely made my lucky drawers brown so I am heading to the laundry room. I just hope he dont have a grandad. But if them bad boys get the meeces, fine. Do it quick and be gone to the neighbors. They got more I am sure. So take the ratpack party and git!!! Holy Crappers Batman.. git git git!!!

Soz, terri, hows the construction at the new Belles going? If you dont build it no one can come you know!

Good thing I got here to the rescue of them voles. You know if you pee down the holes of voles they will go elsewhere? So everyone the john is tem closed, you gotta find the vole holes.
Hey elle, sorry I missed your party, that is me always a day late and dollar short. So much to keep up with all these new cafe's springin up.
Second or 4th. cousin, oh don't tell cheap hoe, she isn't much for mingling with relatives anyway, makes her nervous that they want to move in or something.
Glad I stopped by the new place here, seems odd there is no beverage bar, you know the tipsy sort? Has everyone gone on the wagon here???
I'll stop back when I get a chance, gotta go work on the voles and then "get the hole back to work"!

LOL!!!

Well, the Cheap Hoe does not have to worry. Bloomers aint moving at all, shes a lil stiff if ya know what I mean. Board silly if ya ask me!

Well if you want tipsy, Geeks got the bar as usual. Right now I think she is still having a talk with that sneaky snake and well, I am still looking for coma girl to give me back my drawers. Have you seen terri?

Love your blooms in the June issue! WOW! Gorgeous!

Hmmm peaing on the voles holes eh? Well, that be easier said than done for a lady of my stature! LOL!

Well, looks like rain and looks like I burned up a belt on the mower. dangnabit.. never a summer goes by without me frying one or two. I wonder if I can get the thing changed myself and not tell the hub! LOL.. NOT. awwww shooot!

I heard Geeks on strike!

You meeean shes streaking ttttooo???


Hey wha-airs mmmmmy ttttowel?

I think we should re-name this place Blossom's Bloomers. lol

OK, all snakes now wear invisibility cloaks. So no more brown moments Blossom. lol

Candee, I saved something for ya. hehehe Bombs away!

Terri, how's the kiddo? Enjoying summer break?

Well, thanky Geek, um BTW, your dinner is served....we got breaded chicken, breaded pork, BBQ beans, and mashed dill taters and grrravy! And dont forget the salad bar!

Let Bloomers get that for you too!

Herre you go, the main course....

This message was edited Jul 1, 2009 9:41 PM

Bloomers: Here ya go Geek, fresh brocoli, creamery cole slaw, leaf salad with cherry maters and blue cheese dressing just like you like it. Sorry we were out of cottage cheese though. Things are cleaning out of here tonight fast. Well, must be off to the next table, have a great evening!

Umm, I think terri has your drinks.


Hey terri, you wanna kick milky Joe in gear and get Geek her special (_)? ??!

Bloomers: Ooooops almost forgot your special side order of tern eggs. Fresh from the garden!

Yummers!!! Why thank you kindly Bloomers. It all looks as delicious as it tastes. Love the special side too. Think I'll hatch a few for my catch a nd release program.
Here, I left you a tip: tickets to the opera. You and Madame Woodsy deserve a night off after pulling double duty at two cafes.

Milk shakes anyone? gotta be quick........