anger

It's been a while since I was online due to business. Today I was looking forward to the forum but all I've seen is people attacking people. A lot of ego and condescending attitudes. I talked to one person about begonias and another person talks to me like I'm an idiot. I thought the purpose of this site was to help others and to learn things in return, what happen to that? If I want to be attacked I'll call my mother in law at least I can hang up on her. Everyone needs to stop one upping and enjoy the rare time we have.

kitten0115,
I know you feel hurt,but try to ignore the egos.Although a few people get a little condescending (SP?),most people here are really nice and happy to be of help.Sometimes I don't think people realize how they sound.
Lynn

it's nice to hear a nice person today. I sewar sometimes I follow this forum for days and people get attacked for grammer, what are we 2? Anyway, I didn't get hurt I am so frustrated. I wanted to find a get away from mommyhood and everyting else and find my own niche and BAM ( on my God that was so my daughter) anyway hope you have a great week and look forward to typing with you!

kitten0115 - ok, (bear with me this may be painful) Take a deep breath. Relax. Let the deep breath out (hopefully before you explode). Then let the light in - there is no perfect place on this planet with or without cyberspace.

This has been the closest place I have found yet. Generally the people I have conversed with here have been helpful and considerate. Some of them, to an extent that astounds and amazes me to this day.

I have had the privilege to meet a few DGer's in person and have never been in the least way disappointed.

I have had small disagreements with some and those were handled civilly (we made our points and parted friends).

Good luck - please do not give up - ever!

Kitten, please dont give up, that would be pampering to the few people who use the site like they were talking to a class of 5 year olds, your an adult and enjoy the time you spend on the forums, so dont give in. 99%9 of the people on the site are truly lovely friendly people who have gardening in common, maybe you just came across the 1 per cent who have no manners, no thoughts for other people and definitely no decorum, but like I said, these are very few and far between, in the past you have always enjoyed the site, so dont give up, have a good week and enjoy the garden, WeeNel.

Also, if you get attacked over and over by the same person you should def let admin know.

The majority of the people here on DG are absolutely wonderful.

Ditto to what Wee Nel and Flower Jen said!

Nan

Some things just have to be ignored or chuckled at!

I'll second that!! I am not a beginning gardener,but I often ask questions simply because I want other's opinions or I don't feel like dragging out all of my books and notes(LOL).I have found that as I get older and sometimes lazier It's easier to ask some of the real experts here than to search my memory.I have met some wonderful people here (not in person) and there has never been a day I didn't feel I learned something.This is what it's all about!! Sometimes my grammar or spelling is off,but so what as long as I am able to communicate?
One thing I do encourage you to learn as your gardening experience increases is the true names of species,cultivars,etc.This may sound confusing now,but in the long run it will really help you.Keep your plant tags,too.
I too use these forums for relaxation.Just relax,go with the flow,and never be afraid to voice your opinions(in a nice way of course)LOL.
Lynn

Flowerjen you are so right, but I would rather leave that personally to others, I would find taking that action as making the attacker feel important enough to merritt that type of action, best to just ignore it and try to put yourself in there shoes, maybe they just have sad empty lives, there are very few people on the site that are aggressive or belittle themselves, or take pride in trying to humiliate others with their negative replies, so why give them more attention their childish nature is craving is my thoughts.
I just hope Kitten realises she is always welcome and encouraging to most people, the other person did say sorry if their comments were taken the wrong way, thats good enough for me anyway. good luck and stick with the forum, we all have fun, thats what matters. WeeNel.

There's always the consideration too that we don't have tone of voice and body language here to help us understand people's intentions--different people have different written communication styles so it could be that people aren't intending to come across in the way that others are interpreting it. I think that 99% of people here mean well 99% of the time, so giving people the benefit of the doubt and assuming that they meant well and it just didn't quite sound that way can help avoid conflicts too.

Also keep in mind since it is a beginner forum and people don't necessarily know everyone's level of gardening expertise, a post could come across as "talking down" if you're an experienced gardener, but the person writing it either didn't know someone was a more experienced gardener or felt that since there were going to be beginners reading the thread that some additional explanation might be helpful to them even if the more experienced person wouldn't need the additional info.

Well said Ecrane, I am off to bed now and as it is very late, I say good night to you all. WeeNel.

Kitten, I feel bad that you were offended, but I think you just misunderstood the "tone" of the post you are referring to. I read through that particular thread earlier this evening and I couldn't see where anything was said rudely to you. The person did apologize to you for you taking the comment the wrong way.

The common practice for when you are speaking directly to someone, is to preface the comment with their name or use the Dmail for private conversations. Otherwise any posts are open for the community to join in and comment.

Robin

kitten heres a big hug and hope you have a better day

Yes! Please use D-Mail for things that are best said in private! Some things are not for public viewing and DO offend.
Confrontational personalities are scattered throughout the world and I still think they are best dealt with by ignoring them or (privately) laughing at their insecure little selves.....

Kitten, these people here are really great people. beleive me i came from another site that was mostly crabapple ranters and this is such a pleasant place comparably. and it is pure pleasure to read what everyone has to say.

Sometimes i wonder if i come across as a ranter as i'm at an age i love my soap box. So please tell me when i get carried away and i'll come back and hug you.
It is hard for me to put things into a warm tone as i'm one of those nutty science nerds. who tends to "want the facts maam, just the facts." Than reread and say i did,nt say that.LOL
Anyway hang in here and here's a hug (((kitten))).
Vickie

I didn't take the response as preachy or snippy either. I think the person was simply trying to provide additional information on the subject and he/she did apologize for the misunderstanding. It can be difficult to put things in writing and sometimes the written word can come across the wrong way. Hopefully, this issue can be put to rest. Let's all get back to enjoying our forum :-)

Tonight I have read several forums where people are talking about what and how they say things, and the responses that are given. As someone earlier said it is hard to know and understand exactly what the person is saying because it is difficult to understand words that are typed. Just remember that " A person can accumulate immense knowledge and still lack wisdom. Wisdom requires compassion, justice, humility, and spiritual discernment". Not all people have that ability.

Love it!!!

Good one VV!

Great sign and you have it and we do not. Elaine

That's in Montana. We passed it on our way to Glacier National Park during a vacation in 2006.

I had a feeling that someday the opportunity would come to use what we had found...

And you were so right!!!

Lynn

Hello from Sweden
Kind hearts are the gardens,
Kind thoughts are the roots,
Kind words are the flowers,
Kind deeds are the fruits,

Thanks hobbyodlaren,
I got a good chuckle!!

Lynn

hobbyodlaren,
that looks exactly like my flower garden!

LOL hobbyodlaren--that looks like my garden every spring. Each year when my flowers return, it feels like Christmas! I'm always saying, "Hey, look at that, I forgot I planted it!"

Yes It´s the same for me, I found unusal flower always, which I´ve forget I have sow. It is lucky surprices.
And as the pic, It's like me too, I alway mix up the labels, or even drop seedpots on the flor, so I don´t know what is what.
Bought seeds from Ebay last week and got seeds from Australien.
A nice name also on the seller shop:

All U need is Seed.

Thats the truth - Love and attension make all things grow too

~Sylvia