CHOCOLATE BASIL 2012

Here are some starting points. Y'all chime in, now...

2

3

4

If he promises candy for all, he's got my vote--esp. if it's chocolate!

ISquatch and I love #1

Candy? Why of course everyone gets CB candy.
(After the election of course)

Vort, dmail an address for me to send them to pass on to Squatch.

See, mjs, the Ole Dodge shouldn't take it personally. Squatch just has a taste for old Dodges. Will old Dodge owners get a rebate since their trade-ins will end up as dinner for Squatch?
LOL. I like #2! I hear Squatch is negotiating with Ms. Claus. He is offering her a position as head of the CIA, in exchange for stepping down. (Jim)

How many would you like, Jim? :-)

Two, I guess. One for Old Blue Dodge and one for the lawn tractor. lol.

You got it. Ordered and should arrive in a couple of weeks. :-)

Ole Dodge isn't speaking to any one right now...She's not happy...so how do you think that makes MY life.........Jeesh............Women............ROFLMOL..... and I have to Live with her.

Squatch hasn't offered T.O.D. a position in his cabinet yet? I like the idea of a female in power and now that I know T.O.D. is a she...... Hm-m-m-m, what is Loch Nestle's gender anyway? Does anyone know? k*

Of Course The Ole Dodge is a female.....don't think a boy truck would last this long !!

I had an '84 Chrysler that we finally laid to rest only three years ago. Ol' Norabel (LeBaron backwards) would go anywhere in the snow and ice--I miss her!

I met Mrs. Claus at a llocal food drive event. She left when I did....in a re-furvished, cherry red Dodge truck. I want one like it...in purple, of course. :-) ~N~

I have a purple HHR.

BREAKING NEWS!!!

Squatch was denied participation in tonight's primary debates!!!!!!!

Simply because he stated he "would tear them up"

Go figure?

This message was edited Dec 15, 2011 4:26 PM

MERRY CHRISTMAS CREW

Politician stew sounds good to me!!!! or would it be politician road kill?
Miss Bear says Merry Christmas!!! She keeps picking up my Christmas tree and carrying it half way down the mountain. She thinks Santas Reindeer should have been bears. Much stronger and they like to fly too.

Well shoot, I up early making Chocolate Basil Fudge using contra band CB and was going to taunt Squatch but then Vort put up that nice Christmas Card...

Oh well,I'll Still taunt Squatch with Chocolate Basil Fudge......cause Christmas is the only time I do any of this kind of cooking...
once per year...that's it....

Vickie, I'm sure the Reindeer wouldn't mind a break from the Christmas duties, they can fly down here and enjoy Chocolate Basil Fudge and Cookies with Me, The Ole Dodge, the Ponies, Trudy the Turkey, and a day at the beach.( I'll even spring for the Corona and Limes)

That really is a beautiful Christmas card, Vort. Thanks! That reminds me, I gotta get some cards sent today.

I still do not speak Squatch very well but he's been wandering around the house mumbling something that sounds like:

"PONIESAGRINCHNSOISOLDODGE""

This message was edited Dec 17, 2011 12:30 PM

Is there any truth to the rumors about Ms. Baear and the Coca-Cola Christmas Bear?

You have to ask?!! Obviously, SOMEONE hasn’t seen the photographs in The Herb Inquirer.

LOL

Sansai---you have been reported for posting inappropriate content.

The editors are reviewing your post to determine if it is simply puppy love or bear porn

This message was edited Dec 17, 2011 11:06 PM

This message was edited Dec 17, 2011 11:08 PM

Cando---Santa rejected sleigh bears because bears can only fly when they are smoking chocolate basil.

What!? The brownies don't work? That ain't right...

I think Ms. Bear was just after thecola. She's too smart to fall for that old "Would you like a ride in my sleigh?" line.
Google an authenic picture of a reindeer. Man, did those guys ever get a Christmas make-over! Squatch should hire the ssame image consultant they use for his campaign.
I suspect Ms. Claus rigs the whole flying-reindeer-pulling-Santa's-sleigh thing by having Santa give any witnesses to the real event her special CB brownies. (Jim)

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, except Squatch the louse

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
Stuffed with basil of chocolate and shedded Squatch hair.

Loch Nestle was nestled all snug in his bed,
while visions of CB recipes danced in his head.

And me in my kerchief, and some critter in a cap,
Had just settled down for a long winter’s nap.

When out in the basil patch there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-CB patch
opened my eyes to the plot they had hatched

Then, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a beat up old Dodge and eight Arkansas bears.

From the back of the truck sprung a mob from this site
I knew in a moment we were in for a fight

More rapid than eagles the DGR’s came
and I called every traitor by his or her name.

Now Critter and kudzu, Ky and Celene
Debra from Garland and others unseen
Now podster and cando and Sansai and all
and secan and cyber don’t dare breech our wall.

But up to the house-top the DGR’s flew,
with the Dodge full of raiders, and loco loca too

And then, in a twinkling, on the top of our lodge
was the gnawing of rainbears and an ugly ‘ol Dodge
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Up the chimney Squatch flew with a powerful bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his tooth was all snarled and his hair full of soot.

A bundle of basil flung over his back,
he looked like a madman who was on the attack.

His eyes-how they glowed red! His tooth was real scary!
Blood dripped from his mouth like he’d eaten a cherry!

A tire from a Dodge was raised high in his hand
and the smoke from the remnants circled him like a band.

He said not a word but then turned to the bears
And they took to the sky from the fear of his stare

I heard Squatch roar as they flew out of sight

“Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight”


This message was edited Dec 18, 2011 9:00 AM

This message was edited Dec 18, 2011 9:03 AM

ROFL Incredible! How long did it take for you to write that?

Squatch wrote in about 3 hrs last night.
He was bored :)

Another reason he is in hiding--he is a very talented writer, and he would be mobbed by fans wanting his autograph!

True Genious Vort! Loved it! Merry Christmas.
Vickie

ROFLCOPTER!

The poem is great, and ROTFLCOPTER, hilarious.

I’m starting a new movement for equal representation of the male mentality in plant cultivar names. I’m thinking things like a Hemerocalis ‘Chuck Norris’, Lilium ‘The Terminator’ and, of course, ‘First Blood’ in the new Rambo line of roses.
The Grump-Pas encourage you to keep this in mind, VORTREKER. Sports of chocolate basil are bound to evolve and they need to be given proper, manly names. We can start this new movement among the more open minded herb gardeners. Then, make our move in the solidly ornamental market.
I’ve come to the conclusion that the reason women dominate in ornamental gardening is a direct result of all the foo-foo plant names. As proof of my theory I submit the fact that men are well represented in vegetable gardening. It is no coincidence that vegetables have more masculine names. (Jim-Founder, Presinent and Sole Member of the Grump-Pas.)

Sign me up.

Loch Nestle wanted to join but somehow that name just doesn't "fit the bill"
(I've actually seen him in a kilt.)

I like Habenero (var. Squatch.). I'll work on that

Happy New Year from the sane side of the CB asylum.


Vor, Squatch and Loc Nesle

I'll represent the less-sane contingency.