Off Topic - Going to the chapel

I am leaving home in a few short minutes to see my older son, Ben get married. Wow, it is really something. Not exactly sure how I am feeling. Will check back with you all after the ceremony. Be good and take good care.

Ruby

hope you had a wonderful day!!!!

Tell him and his bride we said congratulations and I hope you have a wonderful day, Ruby.

Have a great time, Ruby!!

yay, 9:23 and still nothing- must be having fun

Ha-ha Sally. Actually we got home around 6 PM I think. I looked at computer and then said nah. The couch looks a lot better.

It is now Sunday morning and I am starting my daily chores around here. The wedding was very nice. The bride and groom did most all of the planning and stuff. I wrote a couple of checks for them. ha-ha It was a mixed religions ceremony. Ben is Christian and Nicole is Jewish. Nicole looked extra beautiful yesterday because someone had done her makeup really well. All the groomsmen were especially handsome and the bridesmaids were dressed in an almost aqua colored full length dresses. Nikki's dress was also very beautiful. The color theme of wedding was blue and white. The food was plentiful. Ben's former roommate is a chef and did a couple of special things, and Ben's dad also made spicy buffalo wings that are his specialty. Lots and lots of cake to go around.

It was good to see people that I haven't seen for many years. Ben's dad and I divorced in 1983 when Ben wasn't quite 3 years old. That meant that I lost touch over the years with Joe's family. It would be about 23 years since I saw some of them. Man is it interesting to see all of us who hung out back in our twenties and now we are all in our fifties.

I guess that my niece from Mt. Laurel NJ was the one that traveled the farthest to attend it. She was married two years ago in San Antonio Texas and we drive down for that. She married a Mexican/American so a lot of her theme was mexican.

A strange coincidense about where the wedding and reception were held. It is called Greenwood Community Center and it was in it's hay day in the 1970's. In 1974 I got with Ben's dad at a party at the community center and we fell in love and were married for nine years. I found it very interesting that is where Ben chose to have the wedding.

Hmmmm.....what else can I say? Oh yeah, they are not taking a honeymoon at the present. Ben took a week off from work and they will be spending the week boxing up things to move on February 9. They are moving from a one bedroom to a two bedroom apartment in the same complex.

I had never heard it done, but the priests that performed the ceremony included in the vows that Nikki' is 5 months pregnant. She (the priest) welcomed Emily Nicole Lane to her new family. So ya'll, I am gonna be a grandmother for the first time in May. Oh yeah, it was funny also, the folks that I hadn't seen since we were in our twenites are all at the grandparents stage.

With every new situationn that arises in my life, I feel a bit more adult each time. I commented on the day of my dad's funeral that with both of my parents gone, I finally felt like an adult. Getting used to the idea of being grandma is also something that makes me feel my age. ha-ha

Anyway, that was our day. All in all, I believe that everyone had a very good time on this blessed occasion. Thanks for sharing it with me. I hope that everyone will have a good week coming up. Take care.

Ruby

Sounds like you had a good time, I'm happy for you. Thanks for sharing the festivities with us.

Chris

Ruby, being a grandma is the greatest youth elixer on earth. Isn't it nice that we're going to have all these new grandmas in the spring? You and Chantell are almost neck and neck.

Oops, Almost forgot to thank sally, Chantell and hart for the acknowledgements. Also, I didn't use my camera yesterday but will be getting a set of the pics that were taken after the ceremony. I will post pics then. Take care friends.

Ruby

Oh hart, I didn't know the news about Chantell. Wonderful!!! Come out chantell and tell us what you know so far about your soon coming grand child. Chris, thank you for the acknowledgement also.

Hart, yep, my sister law who is now grand ma to two young ones was on the dance floor with her three year old grandson "cuttung a rug" more than anyone else there yesterday. So, yes, it will keep a person young.

At my mothers death, the minister met with all of the family before the services and asked each one of us to tell about something that stands out in your mind about your mom/grandmom. One of my nieces said that whenever she thought of Dolly, that she remembers having little friends come and stay over night and my mom would always entertain them by dancing flat footing. So yes, my mom had lots of fun with her grandkids too.

I will tell you one thing that is strange for me. I have never been a mother-in-law and keep questioning the things that I say to Nicole. I wonder if she is thinking that I am being bossy, critical or whatever. I don't want to interfere, but there are particular times that I feel a 51 year old knows a bit more than a 20 year old. I can tell that biting my tongue is going to become a habit. ha-ha

Oh yes, I wanted to share what all the Best Man said about my son during his toast. Fred and Ben met on the school bus during middle school. They began hanging out then and were both involved in many things together over the next about 15 years or up until now in which they play bluegrass together whenever they can. Fred began singing the praises of the kind of man this 6 foot 2 inch and at least 300 pounds of a bear/man is. He said what actually impressed him most about Ben when they were in their mid teens, that there was an occasion when Ben cried openly in front of Fred. There are not too many boys or men who would chance doing that around their peers. He went on to say that Ben was very kind, caring, compassionate and he said if one word had to say it, that Benjamin was loyal. He pointed out that over the years whenever one or the other of them had something major going on that they always discussed it with the other one. I was so proud when I heard all of that.

During the ceremony the priests told of what Ben and Nikki had to say about each other. Nikki said that Ben treated her like a princess and she calls him her gentle Ben. He also had the name of gentle Ben by his co-workers when he was in high school. So ladies, I helped shape that boy. Ya'll please help me pray that I may begin to have the same sort of influence over my younger one who is currently floundering hither and fro.

I put Tucker in couseling a couple of weeks ago and he actually seems to be enjoying it. I am so glad that he has a place to go to and where the other person is trained in how to deal with the issues that Tucker is facing. One step of progress happened on Friday evening. Tucker has talked of a girl named Ashley on and off all year and referred to them as going together. Well, in the literal, they never went anywhere together that I knew of. She called here several times during their Christmas break. I asked Tucker then if he would like to inivte her over or would he ever want to just go to her place and hang out. He never did it and continued on just socializing with the boys. Supposedly they broke up over Christmas and I can't say that I blame her. As far as I could see, he was giving nothing to the relationship. I have spoken to him about it several times in the past and lo and behold last Friday he came from his bedroom and said that Ashley was coming over for a couple of hours.

I believe that his finally getting together with her are a direct result of his counseling and my pointing out that he had to do some things in order for a relationship to work out. She came over and she is really a very cute girl. This young man who has gone out of his way all year to flunk and fail, was actually very shy around her. They were so cute.

Anyway, this young man has a load of issues to be addressed and some things need turning around. I hope that I will be up for the job. I have spoken with two professional counselors recently about Tucker and they have pointed out that he has just come out of an 8 year long abusive household. There was no physical abuse that took place, or I would be writing you all from jail, because I would hurt his dad or his step mom had I ever heard of that going on. He was just verbally and emotionally abused and then basically kicked out. I am just now feeling that he is becoming a part of our family. Another thing has happened since Tucker has begun counseling. He is eating the food that I prepare. He has existed this past year or so on microwave french fries and a very few other things that he would prepare himself. I would have wonderful dinners prepared for us and he would not partake. It has been about two weeks and he is eating the meals that I have cooked. I don't know if that was one of his ways of "acting out" or not.

Anyway, our family needs prayers in several areas and getting this young man to begin to think more highly of himself is the major hurdle that we must jump through or over, or under. Ha -ha.

Thanks for letting me run off at the mouth again. A lot going on here......a lot. In case anyone is confused.......Each of my boys have a different father and are from my two divorces. I finally have a great man whom I love dearly and who I have been with for amost 15 years now.

I hope that everyone is having a good Sunday.

Ruby

Ruby- I am so glad to hear that Tucker is making a change. I'm amazed that in this short time you are seeing some changes, I think that's fabulous! I think the food thing means something. I think he's trying to open up a little. I will pray that every day he sees that he's loved and worthy of it.

Thank you so much sally. I told him while we were driving to the appointment that I was sure that there were many people who loved him more than he loved himself. I guess that I need to remember that he is coming out of an eight year abusive situation. In order for me to be able to accept that, I need to remember something else that the therapist pointed out to me. He told me that Tucker has within himself what he needs in order to heal. I don't have to do it for him, nor could I do it for him.

Poor boy is home sick this morning, I have to call and get a doctors appointment for him. It started off as a bad cough and now he is complaining of a very sore throat. I hope, hope, hope that I don't get it. It takes me about 4 times longer than the normal person to get over things.

Well, clothes dryer buzzer just went off. I am off to laundry room to start another load drying and another load washing. My day will be made up mainly of cleaning house and doing laundry. Fun, Fun.

Have a good week all.

Ruby