MIA Need your prayers!

Dear Friends, as most of you know I am a caregiver by profession. Some of you may have noticed I've been missing for over a week now online. The little 93 year old gentleman that I have been taking care of for over 2 years passed away early this morning. I took care of him 24/7 for the past week. He was a hospice patient and a jolly little fellow right up to two days ago. He left his beloved friends and family here to go meet his mother, father, wife and infant son in heaven. Mr. Doug went exactly as he had wanted. He wanted to go to sleep and not wake up. Last week at the time of his very rapid decline he nor myself knew what little time he actually had left. We went to the hospital emergency room one day, they sent him home the next day, and he had bounced right back and was his usual self. Then 2 days later he was bedfast, 2 days after that he went to see his heavenly father and his loved ones that had passed before him. Mr. Doug was my best friend, I'll be lost without him. I don't know what I'm going to do for the next month or so with out a sense of someone needing me and having to be somewhere at a certain time each morning. Compassionate Care is a big part of my life and who I am. I guess I'll have plenty of time to work out in the flower beds and gardens and on the farm and reminisce about the good times I spent taking care of Mr. Doug. I have not really felt the need to shed any tears as I know that he went very peacefully, in his home, and the EXACT way he wanted EVERYTHING. Thank you Lord for allowing me to be apart of Mr. Doug's care team and his friend. He was a very SPECIAL MAN and will be greatly missed.

May God Bless each and everyone of you and may he have a special place in your life.
Respectfully your garden buddie and Iris/Daylily Hoarder,
Marian

P.S. If any of you have an Iris or Daylily with the name William or Doug in it I'd like to get a start from you in memory of my dear friend.

Bless your heart for you are a rare soul that GOD has placed here to help those that are in the most need. I pray time will heal your heart from losing such a dear friend and I'm so sorry for your loss.

I dont beleive I have any iris or daylily with that name in it ~ but I will keep a watchful eye.

Thank You Ayrica, My heart is breaking and I'm just lost right now. I'll be ok in a few days it's just going to take awhile to let go if you know what I mean.
I want everyone to know that I'm not asking for anything free, if you have an iris or daylily with William or Doug in it I"m willing to pay for it to go in my garden so Mr. Doug will always have a special place close by me. As the sign in my garden says "I'm happiest in my GARDEN" I just always feel so much closer to God there and have lots of little talks with him out there. (grin)
Thanks again, I just need to share my feelings and get some of what's been bottled up inside me out. I had to be strong while I was attending to his EVERY need. I had to do everything for him and put on a front for his family to keep them calm and collected when in reality I was hurting just as much as all of them.
Thanks again now I'm off from some very much needed rest.
Marian

Can you get ahold of some 'Sweet William'? It doesn't have to be one of the other plants, you'll always remember that variety of plant. It sound like he was lucky to have you.

Marion, now take care of yourself

D

You have made a tremendous difference in Doug's life over the last 2 years. He is smiling down at you with gratitude in his heart. God Bless YOU!

I would gladly add to your memory garden if I had anything but I don't at this time. I will keep my eyes open and you in mind.

It's such an empty hole at this time isn't it? It will get a little better with time. I've lost both of my folks to cancer. We took my mom into my home and we cared for her until she passed. I am an x-ray tech and have worked in a hospital for many years so figured that I pretty much knew what to expect while taking care of someone terminally ill. I didn't expect just how much care it took. I also didn't expect how much closer it made me to my mom and how much more I would miss her. I did have my young daughter to help fill the void. I am so sorry for your loss and your pain.

My daughter and I have found that it helps to donate our time for causes in grandma's name. We crochet hats for chemo patients, we've done cancer walks, we donate baskets for auctions for the hospice house, we co-hosted a benefit for Mercy Flight, etc. I'm working at building my garden back up so that we can take flowers into the hospital and nursing home patients. It makes us feel like we are doing "something" beneficial, keeps Grandma's memory alive, and takes some of the hurt away.

With your experience, would it be an option to donate a little of your time for families with a family member who is home-bound? I know that one of most difficult problems I faced was trying to find someone to watch Mom for a few minutes while I went grocery shopping or had to take my daughter to a dr's appt. Just an hour's worth of time out of the house is so precious then.

Sending you a great big healing hug....
Val

Hugs, Marian.

I don't think I have any irises with the name Doug or William, but I will certainly think on it.

What a wonderful part of your life he was.. I don't have any with Doug or William, but that is a thoughtful idea to plant in his memory.

Elaine

What a caring person you are. I pray that God will help you fill the empty spot in your heart and life. Do you grow William Settchel iris? They are prolific in our area and I will share a few rhizomes if you would like some.
Peg

Marian, you have been such a wonderful caregiver. I too believe that Mr. Doug is looking down upon you and wishing you the best as you took such good care of him, Bless you!

I know from experience how important a caregiver is, I would be lost without my wonderful husband! I am sorry we don't have any iris with the names you would like, but would suggest you plant Sweet William seeds, until you find what you want.

I just wanted to touch base and thank all of you for your prayers and kind and gentle words. We buried Mr. Doug today after church. With a little time and so forth I'll be just fine. We had a wonderful time together and it will take a little time of adjusting to him not being here and needing me. Trust me I have plenty of other things to keep me busy and so forth. I will get lots of Sweet William seeds to sprinke here and there. I have tons of stuff I need to catch up on regarding work in the gardens. Hopefully I will get alot of stuff accomplished out there in a matter of no time.

Now on to another very touchy subject. Time to move foreward and worry about someone else!

Has anyone seen or heard from Bev Scott? I was reading somewhere on ??? (maybe Dave's Garden) that Marie Scott had passed away. It was posted by someone from the family. I believe but not 100% sure that Bev's name was Beverly Marie Scott??? Like I said I'm not sure but I did see something along those lines and I want to make sure that she's ok. If not, I'd like to send a card to the family and so forth. You all might recall she had just had a massive heart attack not long ago. Please, if any of you know anything about Bev's well being Dmail me. I think part of her online/user name was Dragonfly62 or something like that. If anyone knows anything please contact me.

Happy Gardening,
Marian

She posted just two days ago, Marian.

Marian, I hope esch day gets easier for you after the loss of such a special friend.

There is a thread of Bev's on the Prayer Forum she posted on a couple days ago as well.

http://davesgarden.com/community/forums/t/1123109/#new

Take care - Kelly

Marian,

Your description of events is very moving and says so much of your heart. I am praying for you. Sometimes in life we find ourselves so clearly in an intense divinely designed circumstance and the strength is in knowing how our Lord has put in place every detail to His liking. You were and are in just such an event or chapter in your book of life. How He blesses you believing daughter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In response to your Doug or William iris inquiry. Have you considered getting a surprise bag from Ghio or elsewhere that is made up of seedlings? You could then name whichever one you wanted after him and not register it, but label it and know it for yourself. I would find the same satisfaction in that that you are seeking.

I have a few seedlings of my own that I do not plan to register. Most are a cross of Silverado and Kevin's Theme. Most have favored one parent or the other with the exceptions of some that are creamy with tan edging.

I would be happy to share any of these with you. You could even register it for all that matters.

K