Why do people have trades then they do not answer emails?

Why do people have trades then they do not answer emails?

It's happened to me too.. I wish I had the answer to this for you. It's irritating, but I try to not let it get to me. I figure if they HAD traded with me, I probably wouldn't have gotten what they offered anyway and they would have taken mine!

Just try to not judge the majority by this minority :)

Got something good to trade?? lol!

It has happened to me several times, just figure the ones that really do send the plants, are the ones to continue trading with. I've met some really nice people and some not so good. I've sent plants that cost me a lot to mail and still waiting on 4 trades that were suppose to be here 3-4 weeks ago, and they don't answer either. BUT I've done dozens that were more than expected, some didn't want anything in return, just gave me the plants and I've made more lasting friendships with the good ones that I will forget the bad ones. It will all be ok in the end. I was so disappointed at first, but the good ones make up for the bad. Sorry about your bad ones, but they aren't all bad. YOU will see.

Just out of curiousity, if someone doesn't sign into Dave's garden on the internet they don't get notified of d-mail...correct? I've tried a few times changing my settings, but I haven't found a way to have dmail come through on my regular email.

I was just thinking if people are not in the habit of signing into Dave's garden all the time, they might not even be aware there is a dmail waiting for them.

But they then wouldn't be on there at other places trying to make trades with other people while they already owe you and they have d-mail waiting.It tells you when you have d-mail if you are on there in other places and I've run up on forums where they were there making comments and trying to make other trades at the same time.

I have had more people ignore me than answer. And then there are those that answer after a long period to ask what you have to offer then disappear never to be heard from again. To me, if they don't want to trade they shouldn't list on the trade list.

Y'all do know that there is a feedback facility for leaving comments about your trading experience with any DG member, right? You can also check anybody else's trading rep by reading feedback comments others have left for anyone else.

For instance if you are contemplating a trade with user pprice256, go to Porsha's home page and click on her feedback link:   http://davesgarden.com/feedback.php?user=pprice256&action=about_user

If you read that someone has been burning other folks, just don't trade with them.

JMTCW . . . ATBTY !     ~     £az£o


This message was edited Jun 9, 2009 12:49 PM

I had anticipated a trade all winter set up for this spring...I dmailed in april and they never responded. They even changed their screen name here. I just left a negagtive feedback for them and last week went ahead and purchased the plant they were supposedly holding for me.

I agree with Lazlo (great trader by the way), there is a feedback facility. But... it takes time to discover someone is a bad trader or seller. People don't give a bad feedback in a week, just after months, after trying to get what was promised. I do have a lot of trades and I always look at the feedback, but a lot of people don't have any feedback at all.
They maybe starters, just as I was last year. I made some bad feedbacks, but only after trying to reach the people several times. What I want to say is: We must live with bad traders, but you can minimise it to look at the feedback.
Jonna

I looked at feedback and still can't reach the ones that owe me trades. The Bible says not to repay evil for evil. Bless those who hurt you. Even in a garden site, Christians are still suppose to act like it, and people gave a couple of them good remarks anyway, so that didn't help me. Some didn't have any remarks at all, But in the beginning, I didn't know they had a place nor how to find it. Now I do , but not going to bad mouth anyone. IT will all work out in the end. I talk to some that were GOOD and ask them if they can help me find things. I trust them and they can recommend good others.

I am a Christian also, and I do not consider it bad mouthing to tell the truth. I consider it bad to let someone else get burned like I did when I could have helped prevent it.

But you can't prevent it. You never know what someone will do. Like with one I made a trade with, they had good responses. She won't even tell me if my plants got to her or not. Never sent mine, but the others she did, send to, couldn't say enough good about her. Who knows what happened.

I want to thank everyone for the feed back . I was just wondering if anyone had the same thing happen.I am a Christian and I try to over and above to send extra if I have .And ship in a timely manner.I am not bragging on myself. I have been leaving good reports for the ones I trade with that does good.I think they should be rewarded for being honest .I know Jonna is a excellent trader.I just found out about the Feedback.I have had a lot of good trades.Porsha

p.s. Not a complainer but I even had a lady say I was rude for not offering her something when all I asked if she would like to trade.Then she told me she had everything I had and had no room but had 500 items on her want list..go figure. But I have meet some good people here.I would surely let people know when I did not receive my trades.Will try and let this be the end.But if I do not receive this week I will let everyone know

I try to send extras also so someone can try it or trade it if they're not interested, also send in timely manner and have made multiple trades with some of the same ones. Several people told me they had problems with different ones, and one precious lady who sent her trade was bad mouthed by another for trying to find out why she had not received her plants. So i try not to use that column , people can get hurt feelings and say hurtfull things in there and be wrong. I appologise if I offended anyone, just wrong for me to say bad things if I don't know what happened. Could have been bad communication. I don't justify the wrong, just try to give the bennifit of doubt, count my blessings and move on. That's all.

I agree with bubba1. And just how long do you wait before leaving bad feedback? And what steps should be taken BEFORE leaving bad feedback? Sorry, but I'm pretty new here & have already been taken advantage of a few times.

ants

I get this from time to time. Someone will d-mail me asking about a trade. I say I'd like to trade and then...nothing, the other person never answers. Why do they bother asking in the first place? Kind of rude.

What surprises me is when I offer something for a SASE and they say great, SASE never shows up. LOL> Come on they have to make an effort on their part.

When I first started on DG, I found someone who had Hyacinth Bean in their want list. I dmailed them that I would send some if they liked. They did eventually write back and said yes..I didn't even ask for SASE, just sent it to them. (I had PLENTY of seed!)
I never heard that they got them or a thank you.. I could have let that sour me on sending seed, but I didn't let it. Just kept going and discovered the group swaps instead.. those are fun!!

But, for the most part, the people who frequent this site are fair, honest and helpful. Don't let bad experiences sour you on what this site has to offer. I have traded dozens of times and had a few bad ones, no biggy. I have SASBEd quite a few times (actually doing so now). I have learned SOOOO much about plants and have developed an avid interest in botony. This Is A Wonderful Place! Allow yourself to enjoy it here, it's a great place!

Exactly, Tubbss...the good folks far outnumber the not so good ones :)

when I first joined this site, I was hesitant to trade with anyone. What I did was lurked on forums and learned by word of mouth who were responsible traders, just by watching the threads.

Any one of them could have refused to trade with me simply because I was new, had no feedback and had nothing of value to offer, but some really great peeps offered me plants and seeds to start me off... and now I have several different things I can offer for a trade (granted, they arent exotic or particularly unique) but they are something.

On the other hand, things happen with people. people get ill, have family emergencies/crisis, lose jobs, lose homes... any number of things that will all of a sudden render a plant trade at the bottom of their priority list. I try to keep this in mind when I dont hear from a particular person. Anything could have happened. I dont wish for things, Id rather it just be a case of forgetfulness, but things do happen. I dont hold it against people. We are human, we make mistakes, we have things happen in our lives.

I did have one person who I had set up a trade with and then didnt hear from them. I was starting to get rather irritated when I finally got a dmail explaining that they had been critically ill. THEN I felt like a git ... of course i dont expect anyone going thru a serious illness, or family crisis to be able to think clearly enough to drop a dmail about some plant that I could get anywhere else... I was just thankful this person was doing well.

Anyway, that was my two cents worth...LOL. it's all good, for every 1 trade I have had fall thru, I have had 5 that were successful.. I'd say those was rather wonderful odds.

If they dmail me and ask for a trade and I respond and they don't. I delete their dmail within 2 weeks. I figured it's summer and people go away on vacation. However, I've been burned on trades before and I will leave negative feedback on people who don't ship their trade - you can change it if they owe up to it.

edited to add - I give people benefits of the doubt, but if they have time to post to a thread but not respond to my dmail, I am leaving a negative feedback. I just state the facts.

This message was edited Jun 11, 2009 1:09 PM

Well said, Kel! I felt the same way being new, but everyone I've dealt with here has been very helpful. Like you, starting out I don't have much to trade but folks have been willing to send stuff for postage. That is very generous and very awesome. I'm mainly a veggie gardener, but since coming to this site I am taking more of an interest in flower gardening. Tough in the desert, but doable. I like a good challenge!! There is a great SW Gardening forum here with folks who are helpful and knowledgable (and very nice, too!)... I always try to leave feedback even for the little things like someone sending a newbie some free seeds. I think that speaks loads about a person. I also understand that there are people who don't follow through and I guess you have to live and learn. I hope to be able to save enough seeds to be that person someday...

Kelly

Me too.Would it not be wonderful to help everyone out ! I have traded a lot of seeds but I will wait when they grow and maybe I will have seeds and plants I can bless people with ! I love to share.It is better to give than receive and I have been on both ends and it is better to give !You want other gardeners to enjoy also.Thanks for reply again.I feel much better.Most everyone here has been helpful when I first started a few months ago and could not put pics on or find forums I needed etc.Just a least answer and let people know if you are interested.That is just respect for the other person.There are exception if people get sick etc.Just keep the person informed if possible.God Bless you all for your seed to spout your flowers to bloom,the bugs to stay away and veggies to be over flowing Porsha

Bless you too, Porsh. Good things come to people who are honest. You will do great. Thanks EVERYONE for your thoughts and help. I appreciate all who has helped me. Thanks Daves Garden for the opratunity to meet so many nice people and find so many nice plants I would never have even heard of if it weren't for this site. Bless you all. Mekos

I have traded alot, and some I havn't responded too simply because I have been with an ill mother.. sometimes things happen.. when I find the time to go back and d--mail someone, then they don't answer me back , I guess my old saying of be careful of what you give in life be cause you might just get it back is for real example here.. I don't hold grudges for people that do not respond, I figure they are either:
busy
or
they are not trading at the moment..
I am not trading anything until october.. I tell people that as much as I can..
I am still waiting on some trades back to me.. again, I figure they are busy, had a life happening that is MORE important than trading on DG, or found their trade supply to be gone and didn't want to tell me..

FYI : I get an email on my personal email letting me know each time that a dmail has been sent so that I know to get on Dave's and check it out. So I know you can set it up that way somehow (just don't remember how I did it). I go through phases of being on Dave's several hours a day and then not being on for several days (usually because I'm working on a project in the gardens or my four kiddos). So I think it is fair to give people a couple of weeks to respond without getting concerned. I keep a very busy schedule, so I try to remember that most people have a life outside of Daves. :-) While I like everything to happen ASAP, I realize that others do not work on the same sort of time frame (DH, for instance) and some people do not consider a month a long time to wait for a trade to happen. I have only had one trade that after 2 months of not hearing back from the person after I had already sent my end of the deal, I just wrote it off and made a note to myself on my Tradetracker (useful tool for keeping notes on good vs. bad traders without having to leave formal feedback) not to trade with that person again. However after several months I found out that this person had been in a serious accident and was critically ill for a long time, and when she did get back to me, I hit the jackpot on seeds! I was glad that I had not written ugly things on her feedback. BUT of course if you ever do this you can always go back in and edit/change your feedback. Stacey

A quick note on feedback... you can also leave a "neutral" rather than a "negative," and you can certainly give an explanation like "haven't received my half of the trade or had any responses for the past 5 weeks. Hoping everything is OK with her." If I see feedback like that for somebody, I don't think it's ugly, but if it's recent I know that there might be things going on in her life that could make trading slow or problematic, and I'll take that into consideration when arranging a trade.

And yes, the DG site sends an email if you have a Dmail that's been unread for, I think, 3 days. But people may be entirely offline for one reason or another, so that doesn't always do the trick. Plus, some providers (AOL for example) seem to block DG emails unless you adjust your spam filter.

I have been here since 2001, I have had some good trades and some bad but the good outways the bad.
If I owe anybody anything always let me know as I still have the same user name as always just moved to the coast last year.
I have d-mailed folks back to get their addreasses and never heard from them again. I think most aren't subscribers.
I do wish people would let me know when they get my trade as I have had quite a few never let me know if they received my sent things to them and I worry a lot.
((((hugs))))

Lavina

interesting comments about the d mail. I've had situations where I've been away on business for weeks at a time, and I did not get an email notification that I had dmail waiting for me. I've tried changing my settings and I can't seem to get that feature working for me. I've had dmail waiting weeks for a response and I didn't know it was there because I just didn't sign into dg.

My spam filter is not blocking it...I checked.

If anyone knows a fool proof way of making sure you're notified by email when there's a dmail, I'd sure appreciate hearing about it.

Thanks....Heather

That's probably a good question to shoot across the admin help desk or post on the DG forum.

Thanks but I tried that and never got a response.

admin are usually pretty good about getting back.

I do think alot of people don't know about checking their "dmail"...

My d-mail pops up when I sign on just like the threads I am following.

Hum
Are you a paid prescriber? But I did not think that affected d-mail and Admin has always gotten back to me quickly.

Lavina

Yes..I'm a paid subscriber.