Mashed/Mangled/Mixed Metaphors

My dear wife (Lord, bless her) is, I swear, the queen of mixed metaphors. Our family even has a name for them. Since her nickname is Putzer (pronounced like the word Put followed by zer, which rhymes with her), we call them Putzerisms. I honestly wish I'd written them down over the years. I forget most of them, but a few remain in the memory banks.

To the kids: "Get upstairs in that room and clean up that pig den."

To no one in particular: "... bleeding like a stuffed pig"

"If you can't run with the big dogs - you got no business being on the porch."

"The early bird always has worms."

"Beat 'em if you can't join 'em."

"Just say 'no' with drugs."

There are hundreds more of her originals I can't recall. I know there are thousands you could look up, many of them well known, even famous, but I was wondering if you had any originals of your own, friends, family, co-workers, etc.?

Al