children in our lives,

Union City, CA(Zone 9b)


To those of us who have children in our lives,
whether they are our own,
grandchildren,
nieces,
nephews,
or students...
here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that
even God's omnipotence did not extend
to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth,
God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing he said was
"DON'T!"





"Don't what?"
Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit."
God said.

"Forbidden fruit?
We have forbidden fruit?
Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!"




"No Way!"

"Yes way!"


"Do NOT eat the fruit! "
said God.




"Why?"


"Because I am your Father
and I said so! "

God replied,
wondering why He hadn't
stopped
creation after making the
elephants.

A few minutes later,
God saw His children having an apple break
and He was ticked!



"Uh huh,"
Adam replied.

"I don't know,"
said Eve.

"She started it! "
Adam said.

"Did not! "

"Did too! "

"DID NOT! "

Having had it with the two of them,
God's punishment was that Adam and
Eve
should have children of their own.

Thus the pattern was set and it has
never changed.




< /SPAN>
B UT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it,
don't be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children,
what makes you think it would be
a piece of cake for you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life
teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend
the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.


2. Grandchildren are God's reward
for not killing your own children.



3. Mothers of teens now know why
some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you.

In fact,
they usually repeat word for word
what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties
is to remind yourself that there are children
more awful than your own.

6. We childproofed our homes,
but they are still getting in.




ADVICE FOR THE DAY:

Be nice to your kids.
They will choose your
nursing home one day.

AND FINALLY:

IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION
AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS
ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:




"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN"
AND "KEEP AWAY FROM
CHILDREN"!!!!!
Quick,
send this on to ten people
within the next five minutes.

Nothing will happen if you don't,
but if you do,
ten people will
be laughing

This thread has 4 replies. This forum is accessible only to subscribing members of Dave's Garden. There are many free features here, and about half of our forums are completely open to all members. And learn more about Dave's Garden, and explore the benefits of becoming a subscribing member.

Want to join? Register here. Already signed up? Click here to login!

BACK TO TOP