HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a copy
of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more ammunition.
Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they attacked the mailman this
morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it
was hard to tell from all the blood. PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house.
Better wait outside
home security
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