The Curtain Rods

Mesilla Park, NM

THE CURTAIN RODS

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and
suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining
room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on
a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few
half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain
rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the
first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything, cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents
were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air
fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off
gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in
the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to
work in the house. The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. A
month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not
find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the
local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a
huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her
the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she
missed her old home terribly, and would be
willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house
back. Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on
a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if
she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour
his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the
moving company pack everything to take to their new home, including the
curtain rods.

I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU???


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