Ah...Summer in Tx.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN TEXAS
IN JULY WHEN...

~ The birds have to use potholders to
pull worms out of the ground.

~ The trees are whistling for the dogs.

~ The best parking place is determined
by shade instead of distance.

~ Hot water now comes out of both taps.

~ You can make sun tea instantly.

~ You learn that a seat belt buckle makes
a pretty good branding iron

~ The temperature drops below 95 and
you feel a little chilly.

~ You discover that in July it only takes
2 fingers to steer your car.

~ You discover you can get sunburned
through your car window.

~ You actually burn your hand opening
the car door.

~ You break into a sweat the instant
you step outside at 7:30 a.m.

~ Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is,
"What if I get knocked out and
end up lying on the pavement and
cook to death?"

~ You realize that asphalt has a liquid
state.

~ The potatoes cook underground, so all
you have to do is pull one out and
add butter, salt and pepper.

~ Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed
ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.

~ The cows are giving evaporated milk.
Ah, what a place to call home.