Modern Medicine

A man walked into an HMO and the receptionist asked him what he had. "Shingles," he said. So she took down his name, address and medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked him what he had.

"Shingles," he said. So she took down his height, weight, complete medical history and told him to wait in the examining room. A half-hour later a nurse came in and asked him what he had.

"Shingles," he said. So she gave him a blood test, a blood pressure test and an electrocardiogram. Then she told him to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and asked him what he had.

"Shingles," he said. "Where?" the doctor asked. "Outside in the truck. Where do you want 'em?"