God decided to take the Devil to court and settle their differences once and for all. When Satan heard this, he laughed and said, “And where do you think you’re going to find a lawyer?”
* * *
The Devil visited a young lawyer’s office and made him an offer. “I can arrange some things for you,” the Devil said. “I’ll increase your income five-fold. Your partners will love you; your clients will respect you; you’ll have four months of vacation each year and live to be a hundred. All I require in return is that your wife’s soul, your children’s souls and their children’s souls must rot in hell for eternity.” The lawyer thought for a moment and said, “What’s the catch?”
* * *
A minister and lawyer were chatting at a party:
"What do you do if you make a mistake on a case?" the minister asked. "Try to fix it if it's big; ignore it if it's insignificant," replied the lawyer. "What do you do?"
The minister replied "Oh, more or less the same. Let me give you an example. The other day I meant to say 'the Devil is the father of liars,' but I said instead 'the Devil is the father of lawyers,' so I let it go."
Oh, NO, Not MORE Lawyers!
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