Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft...............
Today, it's called golf.
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Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it..
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The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
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Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
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How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
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When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
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You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
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One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
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One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
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Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
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Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you.
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If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper, then. Oh my goodness you forgot to pull your zipper down!
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If you jog in a jogging suit, lounge in lounging pajamas, and smoke in a smoking jacket, WHY would anyone want to wear a windbreaker??
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And best of all.... I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Getting Older
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