Comments from Travel Agents

I know some are old, however after another day of a down stock market, we all could
use a laugh! (editor)


Comments from travel agents...
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I had someone ask for an aisle seat on an airline so
that their hair wouldn't be messed up by being near the window.
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A client called in inquiring about a package to
Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be
cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to
Hawaii?"
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I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to
Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the
passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not
trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in
Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I
calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is
in Africa." Her response...click.
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A man called, furious about a Florida package we did.
I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said
he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that
is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the
state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and
Florida is a very thin state."
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I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to
see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said, "But they
look so close on the map."
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Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in
Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a
1-hour layover in Dallas. I asked him why he wanted to rent a
car. He said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need
a car to drive between the gates to save time."
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A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was
possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am
and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that
Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not
understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane
went very fast, and she bought that!
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A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your
physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage
belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She
replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a
tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight. Is there
any connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute
while I "looked into it"

I was actually laughing so hard I couldn't talk) I
came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and
that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her
luggage.
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I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do
I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly
he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight
number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on
them."
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A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola
on one of those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly
to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."
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A businessman called and had a question about the documents
he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion
about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa.
"Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and
never had to have one of those." I double-checked and sure
enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he
said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have
accepted my American Express."
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A woman called to make reservations; "I want to go
from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York." The agent was at a
loss for words. Finally, the agent said, "Are you sure that's the
name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?"
replied the customer. After some searching, the agent
came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every
airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus
anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly.
Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent
scoured a map of the state of New York and finally
offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew
it was a big animal."