Last Will & Testament

Last Will and Testament!!!



An elderly spinster called the lawyer's office and told
the receptionist she wanted to see the lawyer about
having a will prepared. The receptionist suggested
they set up an appointment for a convenient time for
the spinster to come into the office.

The woman replied, "You must understand, I've lived
alone all my life, I rarely see anyone, and I don't like
to go out. Would it be possible for the lawyer to come
to my house?"

The receptionist checked with the attorney who agreed
and he went to the spinster's home for the meeting to
discuss her estate and the will. The lawyer's first
question was, "Would you please tell me what you have
in assets and how you'd like them to be distributed under
your will?"

She replied, "Besides the furniture and accessories you
see here, I have $40,000 in my savings account at the bank."

"Tell me," the lawyer asked, "how would you like the
$40,000 to be distributed?"

The spinster said, "Well, as I've told you, I've lived
a reclusive life, people have hardly ever noticed me,
so I'd like them to notice when I pass on. I'd like to
provide $35,000 for my funeral."

The lawyer remarked, "Well, for $35,000 you will be
able to have a funeral that will certainly be noticed
and will leave a lasting impression on anyone
who may not have taken much note of you! But tell me,"
he continued,"What would you like to do with the
remaining $5,000?"

The spinster replied, "As you know, I've never married,
I've lived alone almost my entire life, and in fact I've
never slept with a man. Before I die, I'd like you to use
the $5,000 to arrange for a man to sleep with me."

"This is a very unusual request," the lawyer said,
adding, "but I'll see what I can do to arrange it and
get back to you." That evening, the lawyer was at home
telling his wife about the eccentric spinster and her weird
request. After thinking about how much she could do
around the house with $5,000, and with a bit of coaxing,
she got her husband to agree to provide the service himself.

She said, "I'll drive you over tomorrow morning, and
wait in the car until you're finished."

The next morning, she drove him to the spinster's house
and waited while he went into the house. She waited
for over an hour, but her husband didn't come out. So
she blew the car horn.

Shortly, the upstairs bedroom window opened, the lawyer
stuck his head out and yelled, "Pick me up tomorrow! She's
going to let the County bury her!"