From English Pupils Exam Papers!!!!

Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and travelled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.

The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of the Bible, Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. One of their children, Cain, asked 'Am I my brother's son?'

Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea, where they made themselves unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cynanide to get the ten commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.

Solomom had three hundred wives and seven hundred porcupines.

The Greeks were a highly sculptured people and without them we wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth.

Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but another man of that name.

Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him.

Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.

In the Olympic game, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits and threw the java.

Eventually the Romans conquered the Greeks. History calls people Romans because they never stayed in one place for very long.

Nero was a cruel tyranny who would torture his subjects by playing the fiddle to them.

Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ids of March murdered him because they though he was going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out: 'Tee hee, Brutus'.



Dry your eyes ;-)

Wintermoor