Three vicars having coffee together one morning discover that all their
churches are infested with bats. "Once I got so cross," says one of them, "I
borrowed a shotgun and fired at the creatures.
It made some holes in the roof but did nothing to the bats."
"I tried catching them," says the second. "Then I drove 50 miles before
releasing them--but they beat me back to the church."
"I haven't had any more problems," says the third.
"What did you do?" ask the others, amazed.
"I simply baptized and confirmed them," replies the third vicar.
"I haven't seen them since."
bat joke
Oh, Mark
Surely Philomel will love this one! It's right up her belfry.
You're not calling me a cynic are you Weez? Oh, no, just the bat interest I guess :)
Good one Mark. *G*
Yes, just the bat interest! Not many jokes about dormouses!
Perhaps we'll have to invent a few then, but i'm all out of ideas this morning. Their sleeping habits must surely be a source!
Yes! You've got to give that a try! One could just adapt an existing joke... but which one? Maybe Mark has an idea.
I have a joke conserning the plural form of animal names:
A man decided to order a mongoose, but thought better of it and decided to order a pair. He began his letter, "Dear Sir, I would like two mongooses." Somehow it didn't look right, so he began again. "Dear Sir, I would like two mongeese." This looked no better, so he thought on it for awhile and began to write again. "Dear Sir, send me a mongoose....PS: send me another one."
Weezingreens thats a good one. I do things similar also when I cant think of a word.
I'm a bat man also and visit 100+ people every summer giving advise to those who find our furry friends living in or around the house.
Mark
My DH & I have discussed putting up some bat boxes in our woods. Bats help rid us of our copious supply of mosquitos in the summer, and I wouldn't mind collecting a bit of bat poo for the garden! My eldest son lives down the road, and he has bats on his property.
Baa
Apr 19, 2002
Mark, never a truer word spoken in jest LOL
WG LOL I can't believe I went and looked up the plural of Mongoose!
So, Baa, what is the plural of mongoose? Actually, Philomel and I had a similar discussion concerning the dormouse. I wasn't sure if they were dormice or dormouses. She said dormouses.
Sorry Weez, don't remember that conversation, but if that's what i said ..........I was kidding! oops
The true plural is dormice.
Although, i feel in this instance it is unlikely that mongeese is correct, however appealing :-D
I can't believe you misinformed me, Philomel. Had I been called upon to use the plural for dormouse in a conversation, I would have been the laughing stock of the bubbas at the coffee shop! I think, perhaps that the plural of mongoose is "mongoose", much the same as buffalo.. a herd of buffalo.. a herd of mongoose.. or is it a mound of mongoose.
Oh dear, i'm still in no fit state to answer after seeing Dave's bleeding heart (not swearing - honest!)
Again, WZ, i fear you have backed the wrong horse, or in this instance, mongoose. If there's more than one they are mongooses! (Yep, sounds silly i know)
Anyone know the right collective.... a slither, a squirm??
A monopoly of mongoose?... Yes, Dave and his Love Lies Bleeding "Do" is a crackup. How nice for Gardenwife to resurrect it! Having joined this February, I'd missed it the first time around.
Baa
Apr 20, 2002
Sorry Mark!
WG the plural for Mongoose is both Mongooses and Mongeese.
whats all this about daves love lies bleeding?
Mark