Accessible Gardening: pain..old faithful jpain!, 1 by hillbilliebo

hillbilliebo wrote:
OOOOhhh I'm so sorry everyone is in such pain! I feel terrible for feeling better now after reading everyone's messages, I'm really not glad you hurt. Just makes me feel like I'm not the only one and that others understand what I'm trying, not very successfully most of the time, to deal with. Regarding sinusitus and sleep apnea machines (I use a bi-pap), my doctor suggested a full face mask for those nights when sinusitis is acting up - it's terrible to sleep with on cause it covers your mouth and nose - but it's invaluable to me because I can't even fall asleep good without my machine on. Regarding the pain meds, I am sooo glad everyone seems to be taking as sparingly as you can for your situation. When I first started having trouble I went to a doctor who wasn't very good and he told me that I couldn't become addicted to pain meds because I needed them in order to function as a "normal" (if there is such a thing) person. Sounds stupid now, but I believed him and ended up in serious trouble. Most anyone else won't have this problem i don't think because this doctor was nuts. He graduated top of his class from john hopkins - but what we didn't know was that it was in research and development. He was using his patients as guinea pigs to test out all these new theories he had for curing fibromyalgia - ended up making it worse. (He's not practicing anymore, long story) Anyway by the time he was done with me ended up in rehab to detox from all the meds he had me on. Other doctors wouldn't even take me until I went thru detox the lawyers had people analyze what we were supposed to be taking and they said all of us should be dead. (I think we're still here because we were so loopy we couldn't remember to take it all) Anyway, the gardening seems to be helping me a lot. The house is a lost cause but have a wonderful DH who does dishes, laundry, and general pick up. Don't know where I'd be without him. I haven't figured out how to resign myself to not being able to take care of things like I used to. I may never. I have spurts where self-pity engulfs me and I kinda give up - then I rouse out of inerta and try again usually overdoing it completely. It's very difficult for me to give up the independance and feeling like I can handle things when I can't anymore. Slowly I am being drawn back to God - I have kinda went my own way and he has been patient with me for a so long. If I can just stay focused (I tend to ramble and lose train of thought - side effect of all those drugs). Guess just glad to be here and still trying. Tracy This thread seems to be an old one I just noticed. Hope some of you are still here. Reroute me if you are to wherever your at now (should I look for enabled gardeners?) By the way my DH is making me raised beds out of tires the heat stays in the rubber in the winter and they're free for the hauling. He even going to stack them says the dirt will keep them together. He's making compost pile out of them too. They look real ugly right now but I plan to figure out a way to brighten them up. When things start blooming in them it'll help tremendously. However, everyone thinks we're nuts! What else is new? Rambling Again - Bye for now!